I love Relief Society. That’s no secret to anyone who knows me. This worldwide women’s group just celebrated its 167th anniversary, and in our ward we had a wonderful program and meal to commemorate its founding. The beautiful statues of angels on every table and the delicious angel hair pasta accented the evening’s theme of “Angels Among Us.”
After savoring our dessert of angel food cake (what else could it have been???), one of the leaders read parts of Jeffrey R. Holland’s recent conference address entitled “The Ministry of Angels.” Here’s one of my favorite parts: “Some of them we walk with and talk with--here, now, every day. Some of them reside in our own neighborhoods. Some of them gave birth to us, and in my case, one of them consented to marry me. Indeed heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind.”
Several sisters then spoke of times in their lives when angels had come along to offer support and love, often in the form of time, lunch, candy, or a listening ear. The size of the gift wasn’t as important as the offering itself. All of the stories were great and served as reminders that we can all do a little more to reach out to our sister angels…and to any and everyone who needs our help.
I must share just one story told that night. Everyone goes though trials, but it seems that many of the trials women face revolve around our families. This story involved the grandmother of toddler twin girls whose mother served in Afghanistan for 15 months. The grandmother lovingly cared for these infant babies while their mother (her daughter) served her country. It was a family affair, and the father and sons also got into the act. In doing so, they all grew to greatly love these tiny girls. As the time approached for the twins’ mother to return, the family began to reflect on this and to realize how big a part of their lives these babies had become.
During these “winding up” days, an “angel” called the grandmother and invited her to have lunch with her and two of her daughters-in-law. They took the grandmother to a nice restaurant, and one of the daughters-in-law presented a poem that she had written for her. The lunch and poem buoyed the grandmother’s spirits as the day of leave-taking approached. Alas, the day arrived, and the babies left with their mother. The grandmother was “okay” for a couple of days, and then the emptiness and quietness of the house hit her. She still feels sad sometimes, but according to her, when she reflects on the nice lunch and rereads the poem, she feels encouraged just knowing that she has angels to bolster her.
Next, we listened to a song about angels being among us as we watched a slideshow of the sisters in our ward. All of us were there (at least all who had been at church the prior Sunday to have her picture snapped by a clever RS counselor), and it was both fun and inspiring to listen to the words of the song while watching the faces of my sisters flashed upon the screen. As I looked at them, I could readily remember something that every single one had done or said to uplift me or lighten my load. Finally, we all filled out sheets with information about ourselves: what makes us smile, five random things about us, our favorite color, what makes us happiest, something we hope to accomplish this year, and so forth. The sheets were taken up and then distributed to other people there who are supposed to act in angelic ways towards the person whose sheet they have. I have someone who’s favorite color is blue. I’d say more, but I want my identity to stay secret.
You don’t have to be a member of the Relief Society of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints to act like an angel to someone…or to have someone show love, compassion, and kindness to you. Do you have a story to share? Or perhaps an intention that you plan to carry out? Please share something. Then I’ll tell another story, this one about a three-generation thing.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Tonight is the last night of the Bible study on Esther, and I haven’t written anything about last week’s lesson and the insights I received. Where does the time go?
Just because I haven’t written anything, it doesn’t mean that I haven’t been pondering and trying to apply what I learned. Remember in the 8th chapter of Esther when she again goes before the king to plead with him for the life of her people? The evil Haman has been taken care of, and Mordecai is now in his place. Yet the Jewish people are still scheduled to be killed in the month of Adar. In this chapter, we see the queen falling at the king’s feet and tearfully requesting that he reverse the edict ordering the destruction of her people.
Of all the things our facilitator discussed last week, the one I remember best is the reminder to “fight the good fight.” Fight for your people, your children, your husband, your family. Be emotional. Cry. Get on your knees if necessary but FIGHT. Beth Moore, developer of the Esther study series, struck a responsive chord in many of us in the class when she said, “Fight for your marriage.”
She read a letter from a woman who was saddened by the fact that after 20 years of marriage, her husband had basically said “okay” when she told him she wanted a divorce. In her case, she really didn’t want a divorce so much as she wanted him to fight for her, for them. After reading the letter to the class, Beth Moore went on say that women want men who will fight for them, who will die for them if necessary. She then said “Fight for your marriage, fight for your family” several times with such sincerity and power that I think all of us were motivated to work much, much harder on our relationships, especially the marriage one. I actually went home and said, “I will fight for you. I will fight for our marriage, our partnership.” I think DH thought I’d flipped my lid because rather than respond to my vow, he asked whether I wanted to eat at Chili’s or the Huddle House.
Interestingly, this past weekend, we watched Fireproof, a movie about a couple whose marriage was unraveling. They turn things around by applying Christian principles of love, unselfishness, and sacrifice to their partnership. It was a great flick, and I couldn’t help but think of the “coincidence” of seeing it so soon after being reminded of fighting the good fight. The basic message of the movie was to never forsake your partner, whether it’s a fire fighting colleague or your spouse. Make the relationship fireproof and inviolable.
I realize that it “takes two to tango,” and yet I earnestly think (know) that in my situation I could be a bit more unselfish, a little more in tune to what he might want instead of what I want. For starters, we went to Chili’s last week, his choice.
Just because I haven’t written anything, it doesn’t mean that I haven’t been pondering and trying to apply what I learned. Remember in the 8th chapter of Esther when she again goes before the king to plead with him for the life of her people? The evil Haman has been taken care of, and Mordecai is now in his place. Yet the Jewish people are still scheduled to be killed in the month of Adar. In this chapter, we see the queen falling at the king’s feet and tearfully requesting that he reverse the edict ordering the destruction of her people.
Of all the things our facilitator discussed last week, the one I remember best is the reminder to “fight the good fight.” Fight for your people, your children, your husband, your family. Be emotional. Cry. Get on your knees if necessary but FIGHT. Beth Moore, developer of the Esther study series, struck a responsive chord in many of us in the class when she said, “Fight for your marriage.”
She read a letter from a woman who was saddened by the fact that after 20 years of marriage, her husband had basically said “okay” when she told him she wanted a divorce. In her case, she really didn’t want a divorce so much as she wanted him to fight for her, for them. After reading the letter to the class, Beth Moore went on say that women want men who will fight for them, who will die for them if necessary. She then said “Fight for your marriage, fight for your family” several times with such sincerity and power that I think all of us were motivated to work much, much harder on our relationships, especially the marriage one. I actually went home and said, “I will fight for you. I will fight for our marriage, our partnership.” I think DH thought I’d flipped my lid because rather than respond to my vow, he asked whether I wanted to eat at Chili’s or the Huddle House.
Interestingly, this past weekend, we watched Fireproof, a movie about a couple whose marriage was unraveling. They turn things around by applying Christian principles of love, unselfishness, and sacrifice to their partnership. It was a great flick, and I couldn’t help but think of the “coincidence” of seeing it so soon after being reminded of fighting the good fight. The basic message of the movie was to never forsake your partner, whether it’s a fire fighting colleague or your spouse. Make the relationship fireproof and inviolable.
I realize that it “takes two to tango,” and yet I earnestly think (know) that in my situation I could be a bit more unselfish, a little more in tune to what he might want instead of what I want. For starters, we went to Chili’s last week, his choice.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
True or False?
I have friends from all walks of life, some rich and some poor, some old and some young, some male and some female, some Christian and some agnostic. Lately, I’ve been thinking about a couple of my friends in the latter category. The stories in the Old Testament disturb them, and they’re unable to reconcile the God of the Old Testament to the one of the New Testament. How can a loving god destroy Job’s family and cover him with boils? How can He ask Isaac to sacrifice his son or allow Lot’s daughters to sleep with him after getting him drunk?
Ladies, I don’t know the answer to those questions. All I know is that all of the answers to all of life’s problems, issues, and mysteries can be found in the scriptures. As anyone knows who’s been reading this blog lately, I’m fascinated with the book of Esther. As a young friend of mine said, “Esther’s the bomb!” Yes, she certainly is. And so are you.
Any woman who reads and ponders this book will surely see parallels between Esther’s life and her own. We might not have the power to save our people on such a grand scale, but we all have “people” we can help. We can all fast and pray and get more in tune with the Spirit. We can all fight the good fight and do our best to destroy evil. We can all be assured that no matter how scary things appear, life can “turn on a dime.” In less than a week, Esther went from being a pampered recluse who hadn’t been summoned by her husband in 30 days to becoming Queen Esther with a capital Q. Because of her bravery and faith, Haman was killed, Mordecai was elevated, and the Jews were saved.
More on Esther later. For now, I just want to comment that trying to argue with God or against him is pointless. As C.S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity, “But there is a difficulty about disagreeing with God. He is the source from which all your reasoning power comes; you could not be right and He wrong anymore than a stream can rise higher than its own source. When you are arguing against Him you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all: it is like cutting off the branch you are sitting on.”
In a nutshell, it’s cuckoo to argue about the being who gave you your mind.
Ladies, I don’t know the answer to those questions. All I know is that all of the answers to all of life’s problems, issues, and mysteries can be found in the scriptures. As anyone knows who’s been reading this blog lately, I’m fascinated with the book of Esther. As a young friend of mine said, “Esther’s the bomb!” Yes, she certainly is. And so are you.
Any woman who reads and ponders this book will surely see parallels between Esther’s life and her own. We might not have the power to save our people on such a grand scale, but we all have “people” we can help. We can all fast and pray and get more in tune with the Spirit. We can all fight the good fight and do our best to destroy evil. We can all be assured that no matter how scary things appear, life can “turn on a dime.” In less than a week, Esther went from being a pampered recluse who hadn’t been summoned by her husband in 30 days to becoming Queen Esther with a capital Q. Because of her bravery and faith, Haman was killed, Mordecai was elevated, and the Jews were saved.
More on Esther later. For now, I just want to comment that trying to argue with God or against him is pointless. As C.S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity, “But there is a difficulty about disagreeing with God. He is the source from which all your reasoning power comes; you could not be right and He wrong anymore than a stream can rise higher than its own source. When you are arguing against Him you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all: it is like cutting off the branch you are sitting on.”
In a nutshell, it’s cuckoo to argue about the being who gave you your mind.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Not Just Yet
More on Esther, this time about her uncanny sense of timing. Have you ever wondered why Esther doesn’t just come right out and tell the king what she wants after he extends his golden scepter? Why does she dilly-dally? I mean, he’s just said that up to half the kingdom is hers, and yet she hesitates. Instead of telling Ahasuerus what she really wants, Esther asks if he and Haman will come to a banquet that she has prepared in his honor. At the banquet, the king again presses her for the request, and again she declines. Rather than tell Ahasuerus about Haman’s plot to have all of the Jews killed, she invites him and Haman to yet another banquet. Eventually, Esther exposes Haman for the wicked, self-centered, puffed-up, evil man he is WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT.
Rereading this passage reminds me of the importance of timing and the role it plays in the success or failure of the events and enterprises we undertake. There are many circumstances in which if we move too soon, our efforts might be botched. If we wait too long, then we might miss the opportunity. It’s hard to always know exactly what the right time is, and when thinking about Esther, I think she had fasting and prayer on her side.
For three days, all of the Jews in the land, including Esther herself, had fasted and prayed. I’ve heard that if you simply fast and not pray, then you’re just going hungry. I have to believe that Esther and the others had both fasted and prayed, and hence she was more receptive to the spirit. Something told her, “Not now. Wait a bit.”
More times that I can recount, my husband has asked, “What’s wrong?” I usually reply, “Nothing really,” and yet most of the time there is something very wrong. I’m peeved, annoyed, vexed, concerned, or worried about something, and yet I hesitate to tell him. Sometimes it’s because of my mood. From experience, I’ve learned that speaking about sensitive matters when angry can actually escalate the problem. Other times, it might be his mood. If he’s sullen, then I can pick that up right away and back off for a bit. If he’s happy, I’ll wait a while also; why upset him with bad news?
And it’s not just with husbands. I used to have a supervisor who was so temperamental that all of the employees in her department quickly learned to read her face for nonverbal feedback. “Today’s not a good day,” we'd whisper to each other. Or “Hey, she’s smiling; now’s a good time to ask about your mileage check.” It didn’t take long for any new hires to learn to read her moods if they wanted to survive. And isn’t this also true with friends, children, and just about anyone with whom we associate?
What about you? Have you ever moved too soon on something? Have you ever piped up and “said your piece” only to regret it later? Are there times when you’ve been more sensitive to that little voice that says, “Not just yet”? How do you know when the time is just right and when you need to be patient?
Rereading this passage reminds me of the importance of timing and the role it plays in the success or failure of the events and enterprises we undertake. There are many circumstances in which if we move too soon, our efforts might be botched. If we wait too long, then we might miss the opportunity. It’s hard to always know exactly what the right time is, and when thinking about Esther, I think she had fasting and prayer on her side.
For three days, all of the Jews in the land, including Esther herself, had fasted and prayed. I’ve heard that if you simply fast and not pray, then you’re just going hungry. I have to believe that Esther and the others had both fasted and prayed, and hence she was more receptive to the spirit. Something told her, “Not now. Wait a bit.”
More times that I can recount, my husband has asked, “What’s wrong?” I usually reply, “Nothing really,” and yet most of the time there is something very wrong. I’m peeved, annoyed, vexed, concerned, or worried about something, and yet I hesitate to tell him. Sometimes it’s because of my mood. From experience, I’ve learned that speaking about sensitive matters when angry can actually escalate the problem. Other times, it might be his mood. If he’s sullen, then I can pick that up right away and back off for a bit. If he’s happy, I’ll wait a while also; why upset him with bad news?
And it’s not just with husbands. I used to have a supervisor who was so temperamental that all of the employees in her department quickly learned to read her face for nonverbal feedback. “Today’s not a good day,” we'd whisper to each other. Or “Hey, she’s smiling; now’s a good time to ask about your mileage check.” It didn’t take long for any new hires to learn to read her moods if they wanted to survive. And isn’t this also true with friends, children, and just about anyone with whom we associate?
What about you? Have you ever moved too soon on something? Have you ever piped up and “said your piece” only to regret it later? Are there times when you’ve been more sensitive to that little voice that says, “Not just yet”? How do you know when the time is just right and when you need to be patient?
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