Lessons from Rebekah

Lately I’ve been pondering some of the stories about the women in the Bible. What were their personalities really like? What about their day-to-day lives and the decisions they made? The more I read, the more I wonder why some of them are even included. What are the lessons we’re supposed to learn from them?
Let’s take Rebekah, for instance. People name their daughters after her, and I’ve heard about the great love story between Isaac and her more times than I can recollect. Lately, however, I’ve been digging a little deeper, and I’m a little disturbed by some of my insights. I hope they’re amiss somehow and that maybe someone can shed a little more light on the subject.

On the plus side, Rebekah goes with Isaac’s servant to meet and marry a man she’s never met. Trusting God and His will for her life, she leaves her home in Nahor with a stranger and travels 500 miles to meet Isaac. That can’t have been much fun. Furthermore, she’s the mother of Jacob, the man who became the patriarch of the Twelve Tribes of Israel. But wait, isn’t she also the mother of Esau?

That brings me to the negative side. Not only did Rebekah connive with Jacob to take away Esau’s birthright, but in doing so, she also brought about a serious rift between brothers. Esau was so angry that he threatened to kill Jacob. In addition, in planning and executing this devious plan, Rebekah deceived her husband in a serious way. When Isaac discovered that he had inadvertently blessed Jacob instead of Esau, he was heartbroken; he couldn’t undo what had been done. Grieved at being deceived by his wife and younger son, he was also sorrowful that Esau wouldn’t receive what was rightfully his.

What are the lessons I’m supposed to learn from Rebekah? Is it okay to hoodwink your husband to get what you want for your beloved son? Speaking of sons, is it okay to play favorites? No, I don’t think so. At the same time, God told Rebekah that two nations were fighting within her womb and that the older would serve the younger. Perhaps she was remembering this promise when she planned the hoax. Perhaps she thought it was the best thing to do and that in carrying out her plan, she was simply doing her part to fulfill the prophecy.

So why is Rebekah so admired? Why are her virtues so extolled? Is it because she’s Isaac’s wife and matriarch of a dynasty? While it’s true that her story demonstrates the importance of a woman’s role in a family, there’s more to it than that. The decisions a woman makes can affect generations of her descendents.

Here’s what I think. I think Rebekah’s story remains in the Bible because, just like the rest of us, she was flawed. Families are complicated, and the relationships within them are dynamic and ever changing. Her love for Jacob and Isaac’s love for Esau could be demonstrated in homes all over the world. She and Jacob deliberately cooked up a sneaky scheme, and mothers everywhere are known to stretch the truth, withhold information, or champion the cause of one child or another. I’m not saying this is right; I’m saying it happens.

A Little Maid

I’m not good with children. Really, I’m not. I can love them and play with them and read to them, but teaching them is another story. That’s why I was a bit hesitant to substitute for one of the Primary teachers last Sunday. However, after reminding myself of the wonderful leaders and teachers who taught my three children when they were young, I agree to do it. After all, what kind of world would this be if no one volunteered to give time, energy, and guidance to the generations of the future?

That said, I’m sure glad that I said yes. Not only did I gain some insights into a fairly well-known Bible story, but I also got better acquainted with a wonderful group of children from ages 10-12. The story came from the II Kings, Chapter 5, and although I had a couple of activities and relevant stories to augment the lesson, I didn’t really need them because the children were so engaged…and engaging.

In brief, the story was about a great military leader, Namaan, who despite his victories and prestige, had a serious problem: leprosy. His wife had a “little maid” who had been captured by one of Namaan’s companies and brought back to Syria. One day she mentioned to Namaan’s wife that it would be so good if only he could meet Elisha, “the prophet in Samaria” because she was confident that Elisha could cure the leprosy. The wife apparently trusted this young maid because before you knew it, Namaan was asking the king to let him go to see Elisha. The king readily agreed, telling Namaan to go and sending him off with a letter to the king of Israel.

Elisha’s instructions to Namaan were simple, so simple in fact that Namaan was “wroth,” especially since they were delivered by a messenger and not Elisha himself. His servants prevailed upon him to do as Elisha told him to do, however, and after dipping himself in the Jordan River seven times, his leprosy was gone. He was clean, cured of the dreaded disease. Grateful, Namaan attempted to reward Elisha, but the latter refused any compensation, instead telling Namaan to “go in peace.” Gehazi, Elisha’s servant was not so scrupulous, but that’s a story for another day.

While most people probably read this story and think of Elisha and Namaan as being the prinicipal players, I keep thinking of the little maid. Not only was this young person (the children and I speculated about her age but never reached a consensus) kind enough to speak up to her mistress and tell her about Namaan, but she did so despite being captured and brought to his residence from Israel. I don’t know enough about her or about the history of the era to know whether this was “standard operating procedure,” but I do know that she was young and living away from her people. Still, she spoke up about the prophet of God, thereby saving a man’s life.

The lesson manual asked these questions that I’d never considered before Sunday: What does this tell us about this faithful Israelite girl? How can our faith help others? The children had plenty to say about the little maid and gave several examples of how they could say and do lots of different things to point people in the direction of God and His servants. What particularly touched me was how they realized that they, like the Israelite girl, could influence their parents, siblings, and maybe even teachers and other adults.

What about you? If a child can influence others by her actions (or his) what can we do?

Eating the Fruit

I just discovered something interesting about Eve. You know how people are always saying that she tempted Adam into tasting the delicious fruit and that it’s all her fault that we’re in the shape we’re in? If she’d just done what God told her to do, then they might be still in the garden, and we might not even be here! That’s a story for another day, however. The tale I want to tell today has to do with just who told Eve about not partaking of the fruit from the tree of life. I’d always assumed it was God and that He gave these instructions to the first couple as they stood there together, listening and learning. Not so.


I recently discovered that God told Adam and Adam told Eve. It’s not that big of a deal, or is it? As people living at this time in the world’s history, we know a little more about Adam, and we perceive him as an honest person. However, Eve knew nothing about him other than that he was the only other person roaming through Eden who looked sort of like her. He wasn’t a pelican or fox or orangutan, but a human being. So how did she know she could trust him? And how did she know the serpent represented evil? Eve lacked the experience and knowledge that we now have.

Today we know right from wrong through reading the scriptures, from listening to spiritual leaders, and from hearing the whisperings of the still small voice. She might have had certain advantages that we don’t (she got to live in Eden for a while), but we have access to knowledge accumulated through centuries and from all nations. We can learn vicariously from the mistakes and foibles of others, but Eve had no one to observe other than Adam.

While living on Earth today has its complications and hardships, it also has some advantages. One of those advantages is having access to so much knowledge, information, and spiritual guidance. We don’t have to take our husband’s word for something…or our wife’s, mother’s, father’s, or teacher’s. We can go straight to the scriptures and then pray about our concerns and questions. We can receive personal revelation for ourselves.  I wonder if Eve even considered that.

I’m not making excuses for Mother Eve. I’m just saying that I was wrong about God actually telling her about the fruit and that today we have access to much more information than she did. Does that mean we make fewer mistakes? Does it mean that we stay away from temptation?

Vashti Said No

Today I saw a young man with his jeans so low that I caught more than a glimpse of his blue anded plaid boxer shorts. I wonder if this is a new trend, having your under garments coordinate with your outer ones. Seems like I read a couple of years ago that women’s bra straps should blend or at least complement tank top colors. Gee whiz. Why not just make sure the under garments stay underneath???

All these sights have reminded me of Queen Vashti in the book of Esther. Everyone applauds Esther (and rightly so) for her courage in going before King Ahasuerus, but rarely do people have much to say about Vashti, the lady who sat on the throne before Esther came on the scene. Vashti, like Esther, risked everything she had in her communication with the king, and she paid a big price for it.

In a nutshell, there had been much merrymaking in the land for quite a while, 100 and fourscore days. After this time, Ahasuerus held yet another weeklong feast, one for the men and one for the women. From what I can glean from the scriptures, there was drinking and revelry among the men. On the 7th day, the king sent for his queen, Vashti, so that she could “shew the people and the princes her beauty.” She refused, and the king was “very wroth.”

I wasn’t there, and my only information is from the scriptures themselves and from some commentaries that I’ve read. My understanding of the events, however, is that perhaps Ahasuerus intended for Vashti to parade around in front of the drunken crowd. Rather than expose herself to leering gawkers, she said no. It would have been easier for her to go along, to be a good sport, but Vashti was courageous enough to say no. She must have known that there would be a consequence, but it didn’t matter. The scriptures tell us that anger burned in Ahasuerus, and at the prompting of his advisors, he gave her “royal estate to another.”

It might be a stretch, but I can see the application of the principles of modesty and courage in the world today. Why do people, men and women alike, bare shoulders, breasts, and midriffs for any and everyone to view? Why do young men feel the need to have their undies showing? Is it because of the need to be fashionable and to fit in? Doesn’t it take more courage to cover up and say NO to the wearing of revealing apparel than to give in to the popular trends of today?

What price will you pay to keep your throne? Will you say no to immodesty and immorality even if it costs you your popularity? Or will you go along with the world’s “look” to be accepted and popular?

Is It True?

 A friend of mine and I were discussing the previous blog about Noah’s wife, and she expressed some doubt that such an occurrence (great flood) even took place.

“Do you really believe that happened?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” I admitted.

“It’s really kind of farfetched. I mean, what kind of loving God would do that to all the people on the earth? And besides, they’ve never really found evidence of the ark around the mountains of Arafat.”

I told her that it didn’t matter to me whether scientists had found remnants of the ark or not. In fact, it doesn’t matter to me whether the whole story was a complete fabrication. What I do know is that it’s in the Bible and in the Quran and that we can learn some important lessons from it.

• Be obedient to the commandments of God. Treat people fairly and be a just and kindly person.

• If God tells you to do something, do it. This is true even if it seems preposterous and even if other people laugh at you. Don’t you just know that Noah’s neighbors and friends had many a guffaw at their weird neighbor who persisted in building an ark when there was no rain in sight?
• While you’re following His instructions, realize that there is plenty of preparation in planning for a rainy day. While we don’t anticipate another such divine deluge, I know that some rain will fall in everyone’s life, and we need to be prepared. Whether it’s job loss, hurricane, illness, fire, or injury, now is the day to get ready.

• Be grateful for the sunny days in your life, and even though there are storms and wind and rain, just know that they never last. Storms always pass; it’s nature’s way. When the floods recede, you might find yourself with a whole new set of circumstances, probably better ones.

• Whenever you start feeling sorry for yourself, think of how “uncomfortable” Noah’s wife must have been. I get cranky when the dishwasher needs unloading or I have to run to Wal-Mart for laundry detergent. She worked like crazy getting everything ready for the time aboard, taking care of animals, and tending to human needs like food preparation (at least I think she must have). And yet, we don’t even know her name.

So was there really a man named Noah who took his wife, sons, and their wives aboard an ark thousands of years ago? Did that same ark land on Mt. Arafat after months of floating on the rains that covered the earth? I don’t know. Neither do the scientists. Still, it’s a great story with many good lessons. Just wish Mrs. Noah had a name.

What's Her Name??

I spent a lot of time with my oldest daughter Carrie this past weekend, and we had some good conversations, especially when my daughter-in-law Amanda joined in our chats. At one point, Carrie was reminiscing about the days when her 7-year-old was a toddler suffering from acid reflux. Nothing seemed to soothe him, and on top of the demands of a crying baby, she had a big dog to take care of. The dog, Sandy, lived inside the house and was forever shedding hair and bumping into things.


At another time during the weekend, Carrie talked about what a breeze it was to pack for only one person for the weekend trip: herself. Anyone who’s ever had a family knows that taking a vacation with them can be stressful, especially when it comes to purchasing the appropriate clothes and making sure everything is laundered and packed. If the vacation involves camping, well then there’s the additional challenge of meal planning and food purchasing.

What has all of this to do with one of Eve’s sisters? Plenty! Although this woman in the Bible goes unnamed, I’ve lately begun to think a lot about her. What was Noah’s wife’s name, and how in the world did she do the planning, packing, and preparation needed for the time on the ark? It rained for 40 days, right? And then they were on the ark an additional 150 days waiting for the water to recede enough for them to leave the ship. In my wildest dreams (or nightmares), I cannot imagine such an ordeal.

For starters, what did Noah, his wife, his sons, and his sons’ wives eat for 40 days? And how did they prepare it? There were no microwaves! Would cooking over a fire be too dangerous? Did they bathe? Did Noah’s wife and daughters-in-law wash clothes? If so, how? What did the animals eat? Incidentally, I read a guesstimate that suggested as many as 45,000 animals were aboard the ark! Geez Louise! Can you imagine the stench?! When Carrie was talking about her dog Sandy, we both talked about the “dog smell.” Although he was frequently bathed, Sandy smelled like the dog he was, and as mentioned above, he shed all over the place. He didn’t have many “accidents” since he was trained, but what if he’d been living on an ark and unable to go outside for a walk?

To add to the 45,000 animals on the ship with you for months, think about what you’d do all day everyday. It’s not as though they were reading or watching television or playing with a Wii. I suspect that everyone aboard was working to take care of the animals. How did they even know night from day? I think I read that there was a window, but still….but still. For 40 days and 40 nights, it’s raining like crazy, and you can’t really see outside. Plus, it’s probably pretty smelly inside, and all you get to do is work.

Before I get too carried away with this, I’ll just say that my lifestyle is one of incredible ease compared to that of this unnamed woman who probably worked just as hard as he did  to make the whole “Noah’s Ark” experience successful. While there are millions of women who care for animals, live in areas where there are monsoons, and live lives of drudgery, I can think of nowhere in the world where they endured what Noah’s wife and her daughters-in-law did.

2000 Years and Cultures Apart

There have been times in my life when I wasn’t able to make it to church. It could have been a sick child that kept me at home, or perhaps I was ailing. Then too, there were Sundays when we were traveling, actually enroute to or from somewhere. I’d often feel a little twinge of guilt about missing church, and to assuage it, my mother would often say, “The church is not going to fall down if you miss one Sunday, Jaynie.” I knew that. What I also knew was that I’d fall down without church, not vice versa. Without the consistent drops of oil, I’d be lost. Plus, I know how easy it is to miss the second Sunday and then the third and fourth once you’ve missed one.


Recently I read a statement about the woman with the issue of blood who touched the hem of Christ’s garment. The author indicated that she didn’t come with the intention of merely looking at this man who could cause the lame to walk and the blind to see. She came to be healed, not to gawk and look. She had faith and KNEW her life would be changed. As I pondered that comment, I realized that she and I have something in common. Two thousand years and cultures apart, she and I both follow Him to be healed.

I go to church to learn and to be edified and uplifted by my fellow worshippers. I don’t go to gawk or look or show off…but to learn of Him. It happens every week. Guess I’d better get off the computer, pack the car, and head for home and church. I need some spiritual oil, and I know where to find it.

Lisa and Others

I’m a lucky gal to have so many wonderful friends who encourage, uplift, and inspire me. Most of them enlighten and teach me something every time I see them. And then some are quite entertaining and fun to be with. While they’re all different, they all have something in common: they’re good people trying hard to lead the best kind of life they can. We all slip and fall from time to time, and we all have our little weaknesses and soft spots, but when we fall, we get up, brush ourselves off, and get going. About those soft spots, well, we try not to let them get the better of us.

This post could be written about one of my friends, but tonight I have Lisa, one of my sisters-in-law, on my mind. It’s probably because I recently spent some time with her in Beaufort, NC where six of us had the opportunity to go on a sailing excursion. Becky, another sister-in-law was there too. Lisa, however, is the one who planned the trip and paid for the expedition itself. Sweet, huh? She’s like that. She wanted to do something special to celebrate my brother Mike’s 60th birthday, so the weekend was her brainchild. She even picked up the tab for dinner at the Front Street Restaurant that evening. That's her in the center of the picture above.

Here’s something I wrote about her five or six years ago that describes her to a tee.
“How fortunate we are to have Lisa in our family. My brother Mike’s wife,  Lisa, has always been stalwart and persevering in teaching Christian principles by both word and deed. Her spirit is sweet, and all within her sphere can sense her serene nature. Not only does Lisa work as a nurse at a large hospital, but she also performs all of the tasks involved in the so-called “second shift” described by sociologists. She plans and prepares healthy meals, decorates their home with taste and style, cleans and tidies their surroundings, shops wisely for bargains, takes care of everyone’s laundry, and rarely becomes ruffled.

"A good mother, Lisa has raised two responsible, mannerly sons who know of the presence of God in their lives and seek his guidance regularly. She and my brother have Sarah Beth, a young teenager who daily enters a war zone as she goes to high school, the mall, or social activities. Armed with years of her parents’ teachings and continuing immersion in church activities, she is helped in battling the adversary. My brother is blessed to have such a wife, someone who lovingly performs the duties of the virtuous woman spoken of in Proverbs.”

Proverbs 19:14
“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children ariseu p, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”

The Hundred Dresses

It’s hard not to enjoy yourself at a meeting when you’re surrounded with like-minded people who are supportive, encouraging, and caring. When the meeting itself is focused on individual growth and service to others, the enjoyment factor is moved up a notch.


Here’s what happened at Relief Society the other night. Three women took turns reading from a children’s book entitled The Hundred Dresses, a book about a little girl named Wanda who claimed to have one hundred dresses hanging in her closet. As far as the other girls could see, however, she only had one faded blue one that she wore day after day after day. They began to tease her about it, and then one day her father wrote a letter to the school announcing that he was moving his little family away from a place where his children were made fun of. To make a long story short, the other girls felt remorse at their behavior, but it was too late to make amends. One of them, Maddie, felt especially ashamed because although she had been feeling uneasy about the taunting, she had remained quiet.

You can guess the underlying themes in this book, and our leaders took the opportunity to remind us to show kindness to everyone regardless of social class, accent, race, appearance, or occupation. Everyone had been asked to bring a dress to donate to Sister Care, an organization for abused and battered women and their children. It was awesome to look around the room and look at the lovely dresses that had been donated.

After listening to the book and discussing its several themes, then several women shared stories about their favorite dresses. Some of them brought pictures of themselves wearing the dresses, and a couple actually wore them that night. Kitty wore an outfit that had cost a pretty penny a couple of decades ago, and the story about its purchase entertained us big time. I loved all the stories, but I think my favorite was Vickie’s because she brought pictures of her wedding that took place in June, 1971. Not only did she tell the interesting tale about how she found just the perfect dress for the right price, but she also told of how many things she and Joe had experienced in the nearly four decades since that June afternoon.

Since Thursday, I’ve been thinking of my favorite dresses. There are too many to write about! One I’m thinking of tonight, however, is an Easter dress that my mother made for me when I was a junior in college. It was made of some pink floral material with a little slinkiness about it. My sister had one too; hers was green. I’m not sure why this particular dress was so special unless it’s because we corresponded back and forth about it, and my sister and I knew how hard our mother was working on the dresses.

Dresses can make you feel beautiful…or kind of dowdy. I try to stay away from the latter. I thinking right now of some special little girls who LOVE to dress up in princess dresses. In fact, Brooke and Emma wore their pink princess dresses to see Toy Story last night. Lauren says that as soon as Sallie gets home every day, she changes into her Tinker Bell dress. Can you blame them for wanting to look like the princesses they are?

I probably should end this post with a serious note that reminds us to give to those less fortunate, to take up for those who are teased or mistreated, and to give to those less fortunate. But I’m not. You already know that, right? I’m going to end by asking about your favorite dress. Do you have a favorite one? What’s the story that goes with it?

Serving Apple Pancakes

This post isn’t about one of the women in the Bible but rather a talk I heard a woman give in church Sunday. One of the things I enjoy about listening to people speak in church is that they often add another twist to a familiar story or scripture that I hadn’t considered before. This past Sunday one of my daughters and I had the good fortune to attend Sacrament meeting in an Atlanta, GA ward, and every speaker gave me food for thought, especially a simple comment by the last speaker. And the goodies in the picture above? You'll have to read the post to see how they relate.

We’re all familiar with the verse in Joshua in which he tells the Israelites that for him and his house, “We will serve the Lord.” He has admonished them to choose “this day” whom they will serve, not tomorrow or next week but THIS DAY. I’ve read and heard this verse about a hundred times or more. Really, I have. I’ve seen it cross stitched and placed on display. I’ve seen plaques and framed art with Joshua’s words hung on walls or sitting on small easels, words to remind “believers” of their choice.

Here’s my confession. I’ve always focused on the choosing part and not so much on the serving part. It’s a fact that tomorrow’s blessings, both temporal and spiritual, depend on the choices we make today. While the verbs seem to go together, I’ve been guilty of choosing more than serving; it’s easier and really requires no effort on my part. However, it makes perfect sense that if you choose Him, you would want to serve Him.

Since Sunday, I’ve been thinking more about the last section of Joshua 24:15 “…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” More specifically, I’ve been thinking about what serving actually means and what I could be doing. It doesn’t mean I have to serve a full-time mission or do volunteer work at the local hospital…although those are certainly worthy means of providing service. In my little corner of the world, I could feed the missionaries more often, treat a friend to lunch, send someone a note or card, watch a young mother’s child so that she could have a little free time, take a neighbor some cookies, advise a student on career choice, lend someone a book, and so forth. The list of little ways to follow Joshua’s instruction are numerous and varied.

I absolutely have to share a recent example of serving that I witnessed yesterday. It’s about my friend Connie who just came back from a mountain getaway with her husband. She took lots of beautiful pictures and posted them all on the internet for other people to enjoy. Then she started a little contest, and the winner is going to get a basket of goodies that Connie purchased while on her trip. I see that as serving. She could have kept everything (memories, pictures, and treats) all to herself. But she didn’t. She knows choosing means loving and sharing and serving, and that’s what she’s doing. Check out her blog at http://fogle143.blogspot.com/
and throw your name in the hat. (I couldn't get this link to work, but you can use the one to Loose Lemons in the sidebar).

I’m curious about the thoughts of any readers that might be reading this. Have you, like yours truly, focused more on the choosing than the serving part? Can you think of some little acts of service you’ve seen around you lately?

Aunt Doc, a.k.a. Dorcas

It started with a conversation about Aunt Doc, a.k.a. Dorcas. I was telling Paul and Amanda a little bit about her, my grandmother’s oldest sister. A seamstress and smart lady, she lived to be mid-90 (not sure of the exact age). Her husband died at a relatively young age leaving her with a daughter to raise, and she never remarried. I used to go to North Carolina with my grandparents often as a child, and we’d always stay at her house. From my youthful vantage point, it seemed that my grandmother and her sisters all looked up to Aunt Doc and admired her greatly. A sharp business woman, she was a seamstress who owned her own shop downtown.

Anyway, as I was telling Paul and Amanda about her, they looked at each other with that “aha” expression, and he said, “Yeah, we did some genealogy work about her and wondered what kind of name that was. We weren’t even sure how to pronounce it.”

“I don’t know how to pronounce her name either,” I admitted. “I always called her Aunt Doc.”

“But Dorcas…what kind of name is that?” Paul persisted.

“Well, I don’t know what her parents were thinking, but I do know that Dorcas was a pretty well-respected woman in the New Testament.” I replied. “She was even called a disciple.”

Naturally, I couldn’t think of the exact scripture at that moment, but later I looked it up. Acts 9: 36 – 43 tells her story.

The Dorcas in Acts was a seamstress like Aunt Doc, and she evidently did a lot of good for other people and was greatly loved. I’m saying that based on the weeping and wailing that went on in her room after her death. Her friends sent for Peter, who upon his arrival, asked the widows and grief stricken friends to leave the room. After praying, he then brought her back to life, and although that’s the last time we read about Dorcas, I like to think that she spent several more years “doing good” and sewing for others.

Last week, our ward’s Relief Society tied quilts for the Ronald McDonald house, and when I saw the pictures, I thought, “Wow! We have at least a dozen Dorcases in our ward.” I wasn’t there that night, and I can’t sew well enough to make clothing or quilts. I can, however, support those who do, including my daughter Carrie who has caught the sewing bug and has created many articles of clothing for her children. Above is a photo of Braden and Brooke sporting their new pajama pants.

The world has need of more Dorcases. Just because she’s only given two verses in the New Testament, it doesn’t mean that she wasn’t important. I think her life had great significance and that we could all learn a lesson or two from her.

Lily-livered is the Merriam Webster word of the day. Don’t you just love it? It has so much more punch than that cowardly or weak. It’s right up there with spineless and gutless, and I can’t help but notice how those two adjectives, like lily-livered, are also related to the body. The reason the term impressed me so much is that lately I’ve been thinking more about all of the courageous women in the Bible…and all of the injunctions we’re given to be brave.

I have a busy day ahead of me so I’ll just mention two or three. Queen Esther heads my list, and anyone who’s read very much of this blog won’t be surprised by that. Risking her life, she went before the king to request a favor, and as a consequence she saved the Jewish people. Oh, and the bad guy got killed. Think what might have happened if she hadn’t squared her shoulders and said, “If I perish, I perish.”

Then there’s the woman in the New Testament who risked ridicule and censure as she made her way through the crowd to touch the hem of Christ’s robe. After suffering from an issue of blood for twelve years, she was willing to feel the fear and do it anyway. We usually think of faith as being her primary virtue, but I can see that it took courage to do this. And what did Christ do? He somehow felt her touch and turned to the crowd to ask who had touched the robe. She could have slunk off, but no, “she came trembling” (Luke 8:47) and fell down before Him. She was healed immediately and gently told to go in peace.

Although there are dozens of brave women in the scriptures, there’s just one more that I have time to mention this morning, a very young woman named Mary. The older I get, the more amazed I am at the courage, faith, and humility of the mother of Christ. In my wildest dreams, I can’t imagine being visited by an angel telling me that I’m going to be the mother of the Savior of mankind. Mary was a young teenager who never “known” a man. I don’t know what her parents had to say about the situation. I have a hard enough time imagining the conversation with Joseph.

We all feel fearful from time to time. Sometimes we need courage to speak up for ourselves, and sometimes we need to speak for those who have no voice (in a manner of speaking). Sometimes we need to ask for help, healing, or a hand, and at other times we just need to do what our Creator asks us to do. Don’t be lily-livered. Just do it!

Thanks, Mr. Tyndale

Sunday’s Relief Society lesson went well if I do say so myself, not because of anything I did but because of two other reasons: the topic itself and the people in the class. Scripture study was the topic, and class members were as attentive and participative as always. They’re such a delightful group that I think if I said, “Today the lesson’s about the 12 tribes of Israel, and I’m feeling a little inadequate,” they’d come to my rescue…not because they’re a room of know-it-alls and show-offs but because they know why we’re there: to love, encourage, and support one another. After all, they're Eve's sisters.

The lesson was about scripture(s), and as I began to read and prepare, I was amazed at the things I learned and the things I was reminded of. Admittedly, I often take the scriptures for granted. I think most people do. Yet there was a time in the not too far distant past when ordinary people like us didn’t have access to the Bible, much less any other books of scripture.

In my preparation, I learned of a man named William Tyndale who was strangled and then burned at the stake for translating and publishing the Bible in English. This happened in 1536, not even 500 years ago, and while that seems like a long time, it really isn’t. An educated man, Tyndale spoke eight languages and was a member of the Catholic clergy. Distressed that the common man had no access to the scriptures, Tyndale sought church approval to translate the Bible into English. After being denied approval, he fled to Germany, and with the help of friends, translated and published the Old and New Testaments and smuggled published copies into England. Tyndale’s work is the foundation for the King James Version of Bible.

William Tyndale isn’t the only person to whom we owe a debt of gratitude, but he’s the one I’m thinking of this afternoon. I’m thinking of how this man was willing to sacrifice his life because of his unwavering commitment to make the words of God available for all people…or at least the English speaking ones. And yet today many people take this great book for granted…or perhaps don’t even realize its importance. It sits on a shelf gathering dust instead of enlightening the minds of its owners.

Today we not only have the King James Version of the Bible, but we also have several other versions. On my shelf is a version of the New Testament entitled The Message which reads like a narrative. I also have a copy of the Women’s Devotional Bible, a gift from my sister. Being LDS, I have copies of The Book of Mormon, The Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price. I can also access the words from all of these books (and many more) online. Heck, I can even have daily scripture messages sent to my hotmail address, and they show up on my cell phone. How convenient is that? I truly have no excuse not to read and ponder.

It occurs to me that one of the reasons the scriptures are so readily available is that perhaps God is trying to send us a message. Maybe He thinks we need instruction, inspiration, guidance, and peace more than ever. I love the Young Women’s theme this year, probably because of the encouragement it offers. The theme comes from Joshua 1:9, and it fills me with hope. “Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”

Be strong. Be tough. Be strong. You’re not alone…not ever.

Better Together

A couple of Saturdays ago, I was strolling down the beach and saw a flurry of activity ahead. There were three or four men wearing suits, and as I got closer, I spied two men in military uniforms. Other people joined the crowd, all dressed in their Sunday best. And there she was: a beautiful barefoot bride making her way down the dunes toward the wedding party. I couldn’t resist watching for a few minutes, so I stood off to the side with some other gawkers.

After a few minutes, I continued my walk down the strand, and when I returned about 30 minutes later, there were only three people there, the newlyweds and the person who married them. I couldn’t help but think that sooner or later, it all comes down to just two people. Others are there to support and encourage the couple, but ultimately they’re on their own. Yes, I know that God is the third partner in a marriage (or should be), but that’s a post for another day. Today my focus is on the two who say, “I do.”

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the Adam and Eve story. Not only were they the first married couple and first parents, but as far as we know, they stayed together despite a rocky start. I recently re-read their story for a lesson I was to teach, and today I’m pondering some of the insights I gained from studying the account in Genesis. It hit me for the first time that although Eve did what she was told not to do, Adam stuck by her side. Maybe it was because she was the only other human around, but I think it was more than that.

This is my take on it. After Eve had partaken of the fruit, she told Adam what she had done. She “fessed up” rather than try to hide it. Yes, perhaps she should have consulted with him beforehand, but I’m thinking of how appealing and delicious Satan made the fruit look to her. Eve might well have asked herself why something so beautiful should be forbidden. Like I’ve often heard other women (and men) reason, she might have decided it was easier to get forgiveness than permission. Whatever her motives, Eve succumbed to the serpent’s temptation. Is there a woman alive who hasn’t???

Here’s the part I like. When Eve told Adam what she had done, he didn’t berate her, scold her, criticize her, or give her a lecture on morality and honesty. Nope. He took a bite too. They were partners who were working on their “oneness,” and he seemed to recognize that. They then became aware of their nakedness, and both attempted to cover it. Together, they tried to hide from God. He, of course, knew of their transgression and of their location. It’s worth noting that they are together when He discovers them; they were united. It’s true that Adam sort of tried to pass the buck and blame his disobedience on Eve, but still….

Together, they’re expelled from Eden, and together they begin their mortal life, one of toil and trouble and sorrow. I’m not saying they don’t share laughter and some fun times too. (I sure hope they do). I’m just saying that Adam stuck by her and that together they left the garden. I see a lesson for us in there. Do you?

Perceived Righteousness

Watching Annual Conference was an interesting experience yesterday, quite challenging too. We don’t have the BYU channel here at the beach, but “no problem,” I thought. I had my trusty pink Dell laptop and was confident that we could all watch it online. And actually, I was right; we could watch it, but we really couldn’t hear it very well. Despite our efforts to change it, the volume stayed low. Plus, there was the constant background noise of four active little children, one of whom is still a demanding infant. Adorable beyond description, Colton just couldn’t understand why all the grown-ups had rather look at a computer screen than at him.

That said, I did get a few nuggets to ponder from yesterday’s experience. I was reminded of the importance of loving and serving one another. Despite a person’s skin color, country of origin, or bank account, he or she is still a child of a loving Heavenly Father. According to Elder Uchtdorf, sometimes people hold themselves in high esteem because of wealth, prestige, or perceived righteousness. I loved that he said that. Why?? Because it’s so true. For some reason, the wealth and prestige part doesn’t bother me nearly as much as the perceived righteousness.

The “holier than thou” aspect really bugs me. I’ve heard a woman hiss hatefully at her husband when he asked her a question during Sunday school, a woman who purports to be the perfect wife and mother. I’ve heard innumerable (yes, that many) accounts of people judging others (Did you see than short dress???) from people who darken the church doorways whenever they’re open. I’ve been in homes too cluttered and dirty to feel the spirit and been judged by its owners for drinking caffeine. When I was a younger mother, I was hurt many times by “well meaning Christians” who took it upon themselves to remind me that my place was in the home with my children, not in the workplace. I know people who wouldn’t watch a television program on Sunday who are so “righteous” that being around them is scary. Really.

I’m a roll this morning and could go on and on. But then, I’d be guilty of doing the very thing I’m preaching against: being judgmental and hypocritical. I’ll quit while I’m ahead. I hope we can embrace all of God’s children and remember that love is the word.

Following Brooke

I doubt if anyone who attended Fast and Testimony Meeting in our ward Sunday came away unmoved. If so, I have to think that he or she has a cold, cold heart or serious struggles with “the adversary.” One of the things I love so much about these meetings is that I get to learn what’s in the hearts of others…how they really feel about life, their families, and of course the gospel of Jesus Christ. Some people express gratitude, and others share struggles and concerns.

Time prohibits a full account of all of the testimonies I heard, so I’ll just share a couple that are on my mind today. Let’s start with yours truly. I had actually forgotten that it was F & T Sunday until I arrived, and as soon as I was reminded of it, I thought something like, “Oh great. I love to hear what my fellow church members have to say.” Almost instantly, I recalled something I’d read in one of Henry B. Eyring’s books about listening to others, something about how God will speak to you when and if you earnestly listen to the words of others when they are speaking about Him and/or spiritual matters. It occurred to me that it’s not fair to always be on the listening side and that I needed to share my testimony with my ward family.

Anxiety kept me in my seat for about two minutes until I remembered my sweet little granddaughter Brooke. Though only 5, she often bravely walks up on the stand and tells the congregation how much she loves Jesus…and her family. What a great role model! I shared several thoughts with the congregation Sunday, but the primary one was that regardless of what kind of suffering, pain, loss, heartache, disappointment, or despair, there is only one source of solace. I don’t know the reason for so much pain and evil in the world; I only know that without some sort of faith in a Supreme Being, you’re in for a much rougher road.

*Kitty talked about the power of prayer and how she’d felt its power so many times in her life.
*Mari, a lovely young woman, began her testimony in a way that reflected my feelings to a tee. She said she had felt compelled to come to the front, and yet when she got there and saw all of the people staring at her, she thought something like, “Am I really up here? How did I get here????” Anyway, one of the many things she said that found me nodding in agreement is she knew every person there was anxious for her success and happiness, and that although she didn’t know everyone, she knew that every single person would stand behind her…and would help her if necessary. She’s right, you know. I’ve felt that unity many times.
*Then there was Willette whose words made me chuckle a little. She shared that when her son was on his mission, she and her husband Larry vowed to bring as much harmony and peace into their lives as possible. They decided to begin singing a Primary song, I’m Trying to be Like Jesus, every time either of them raised their voice, began gossiping, acting uncharitable, etc. She said she bet they sang that hymn a million times!
*Izzy spoke of her love for the gospel and her deep gratefulness of how it had come into her life.
*Joann told of some of her challenges in life and of how thoughts of Joseph Smith and his unflinching courage had often strengthened her. She shared a specific example of how painful a “tar and feather” incident had been, especially when his wife Emma unavoidably removed pieces of his flesh when peeling off the tar.

We closed the last meeting, Relief Society, with Love One Another, and I left the building buoyed up by the music, words, hugs, smiles, talks, lessons, and prayers of the morning. It’s only Tuesday, and I’ve been annoyed and irritated plenty of times since then. But you know what? I think of Willette and Larry singing and find myself humming the tune to their song.

More Mary, Less Martha

Sometimes all people want is to be heard. A couple of weeks ago, my father-in-law passed away, and as several of us were standing outside of his room, an elderly gentleman walked up and said something like, “I know what you’re going through.” He and I looked at each other eyeball to eyeball, and when he knew that I was listening, he told me that his wife of many decades that died three months earlier, somewhat unexpectedly. I could have said, “Can’t you see that we’re sort of tied up with our own sorrow right now?” but I didn’t. Along with a couple of other people, I just stood there and listened.

I’ve often pondered over the brevity of Mary and Martha story in Luke. Although short, it contains many lessons, primarily the one about keeping our eyes, ears, hearts, and minds centered on the words of Christ. That short passage in Luke has prompted many discussions among my female friends as we struggle to balance the demands of our families and homes with the need to search, ponder, and pray.

This past week I learned yet another way to interpret the Mary/Martha story. When Christ tells Martha that Mary is about the “better part,” I think that he’s referring to her state of attentive mindfulness in general. Not only is he telling the sisters that listening to His words is important, but He’s also implying that we need to adopt that attitude when with our loved ones…and anyone else who’s in need of a listener.

Within our homes, there is often space and separation when there could be connectedness and communication. We talk and listen, but we do it with our heads and not our hearts. We discuss bills, dinner plans, the weather, and the latest movies, but we avoid feelings and dreams. We’re always flitting about hither, thither, and yon when perhaps our time would be better spent just listening, being fully present. Without being judgmental, impatient, or “cumbered about,” we need to sit quietly in the presence of these people in our lives.

Doesn’t Christ say that when you’ve done it unto the least of one of these, that we’ve done it unto Him? So while reading scriptures and praying is important, so is paying mindful attention to others. This week, I’ve been trying to follow Christ’s gentle instruction to Martha, and it’s SO HARD. I find myself wanting to rush in and finish sentences, go for a walk, or give advice. Part of my struggle is because of life in the 21st century with all of its craziness. Excuses aside, I’ve been instructed by the Master himself, so I’m earnestly going to try harder to be more patient and thoughtful.

Sometimes all people want is to be heard.

Life Goes On

When asked what he’d learned about life, Robert Frost reportedly said, “It goes on.” Yesterday and today, I've been thinking about those three little words quite a bit. My father-in-law died yesterday afternoon, and while there was sadness all around, there was also conversation about the business of life. Who would the pallbearers be? What should be included in the obituary? When I left for work this morning, my husband was busy reading the up-to-date news on the internet. I had already washed a load of clothes and gathered the trash for the garbage pickup. Life goes on.

A friend of mine lost his mother a few years ago, and the "life goes on" proverb applies to her situation as well. Truly one of "Eve's Sisters," this mother and grandmother had lived a full and loving life. I remember dealing with some of my friend's students and how struck I was with the stark juxtaposition of life and death.

Here's the excerpt from my book:

“O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?” 1 Corinthians 15:55

Although there was a note on the door indicating that the instructor would not be meeting his class today, the students were standing around speculating about what they should do. “Was a substitute coming?” they wondered aloud. “Was there a homework assignment?” Overhearing their comments, I stopped to tell them that their instructor’s mother had passed away and that he would probably be back in class by Thursday.

Conscientious and anxious about the Spanish class, they pressed for more information on what I thought they should do. “Check his resource page,” I suggested. “You know that if he has any announcements or assignments, he’ll post them there.” Seemingly satisfied with that answer, they began to disperse.

Walking away, I thought of how even death itself makes no dent in the lives of those not personally affected. Jim’s saintly mother had gone to meet her Maker, and his students, although concerned about him and his welfare, wanted to know about their Espanol assignments. Knowing Jim, I knew that despite his grief, he too had his classes and responsibilities on his mind. After all, life goes on. Bills must be paid, obligations must be met, and students must be taught proper verb conjugations and days of the week in Espanol.

Further reflection reminded me of doctrine I’d been taught since childhood: Physical death is spiritual birth. Although it’s natural for the living to mourn the loss of a loved one, the recently departed are yet living for they have been spiritually reborn. I recalled how Jim had described his mother’s strong belief in the power of prayer and of her daily study of the scriptures. In fact, when taking a test to enter Seminary decades earlier, Jim successfully completed the exam on the first try because of his mother’s tutelage.

“Yes,” I thought, “Life goes on, and today this faithful Christian was alive in a more heavenly sphere.”

“When we die we shall go on living.” Gordon B. Hinckley

And I sincerely believe that. We do keep on living...in another sphere, a more celestial one. Here on earth and there in the heavens, life goes on.

When You Stand With Me

Last night's introduction/orientation to Celestial University was awesome. I realize that awesome is probably an overworked word these days, but honestly, it fits here. I'm sitting here this morning wondering what to major in and whether I should pursue the terminal degree or stop after the BA. I'm also remembering Sophia's beautiful and seemingly effortless yoga demonstration. Loved the fruit too...and the numerous conversations with the women there, some zany and some serious and some artsy. Rather than create something new about Relief Society this morning, I decided to go to Musings of a Missionary Mom and find a entry that I could copy and paste.

Before pasting the entry, I also want to mention the first couple of lines from a hymn we're learning in our stake: "I may be one, but one becomes two when you stand with me and I stand with you." When put with the melody, those words and the others in the song are absolutely soul stirring. While I think of all of the women in this worldwide organization when hearing this song, I also think of my precious daughters and daughter-in-law. The picture above is of Carrie and Amanda modeling their aprons at Christmas.

Okay, here goes: "I love Relief society. That's no secret to anyone who knows me, church member or not. The first time I attended was one Sunday morning three decades ago when the teacher was teaching a cultural Refinement lesson on Sri Lanka. "Huh? What is this?" I wondered. It seemed too good to be true...just like school but no tests. Plus, I loved the variety of women in the room, old and young, short and tall, rich and poor, single and married. We had one thing in common: we were all daughters of a Heavenly Father who loved us, and among our many roles in life were those to love, support, and encourage one another.

That was many years ago, and the curriculum has changed to more accurately reflect the church's growing and increasingly diverse membership. We don't have Cultural Refinement lessons anymore,and yet we always learn something useful, edifying, or inspirational in our meetings. The topics vary from stress management and keeping an orderly home to the necessity of prayer and the importance of scripture study. I've never come away without learning something that would improve the quality not only of my own life but those of my family, friends, and acquaintances.

As an example, in my develometnalal psychology classes, a frequently occuring topic is discipline. While it's helpful to know that assertive discipline is effective and that a parent should be consistent, fair, and immediate in administering consequences, the advice of Brigham Young that I picked up in a Sunday meething has proven most helpful to me: "Bring up your children in the love and fear of the Lord; study their dispositons and their temperaments, and deal with them accordingly, never allowing yourself to correct them in the heat of yor passion; teach them to love you rather than to fear you."'

For those of you who were in attendance last night, you might be interested in knowing that I've already begun working on the theology requirement for the degree. Still haven't decided on my major yet. Is there an academic advisor out there??

Freedom to Choose

I feel okay about the lesson I taught in Relief Society earlier today. No, wait, let me rephrase that. I think the lesson that the sisters and I taught in Relief Society went well today. In our ward, we “never walk alone,” so to speak. Anyone who’s ever taught in Camden knows that she can count on relevant participation from the class. Whether it’s sharing a story, reading a scripture, adding insight, or answering a question, we help each other.

Today the lesson was entitled “Freedom to Choose,” and before I’d gone too far into the lesson, Anita mentioned that while we’re free to choose our behavior, we’re not free to choose the consequence. So true! Hoping that someone would say that, I had actually put a stick in my bag as a visual aid. I held up the stick and said, “You can’t pick up one end of a stick without picking up the other.” You can’t choose a course of action without also picking up a consequence.

Naturally, we want the consequences to be good ones. We want to feel peace, joy, happiness, discernment, and the presence of the Holy Ghost as our companion. How can we do this? It’s simple. We need to learn and obey the commandments. From the lesson manual, God’s “commandments direct us away from danger and towards eternal life. We will gain exaltation, progress eternally, and enjoy perfect happiness.” Is there anyone out there who doesn’t want that??? I think it was Brigham Young who so aptly said, “If you want to enjoy the favor of our Heavenly Father, do His will.”

And how do you know His will? You search, ponder, and pray. You read scriptures, listen to uplifting talks, read inspirational literature, contemplate what you’ve read, and pray. Pray for guidance, for help with your family, for answers to questions, for clarity of thought, and for anything else you need. There’s nothing too small (or too large) to take to God in prayer.

Sometimes people get exasperated and impatient when they don’t immediately receive positive consequences for their choices. They don’t realize that there’s most often a space between the action and the consequence. As President Ezra Taft Benson said, “One of the trials of life is that we do not usually receive immediately the full blessing for righteousness or the full cursing for wickedness. That it will come is certain, but ofttimes there is a waiting period that occurs, as was the case with Job and Joseph.”

This post could go on and on, but I need to wrap it up and go for a walk. In the meantime, thanks to Joann, Cookie, Willette, Anita, Vickie, Martha, Cookie, Joy, Brenda and Sue for your comments and to the rest of the class for their attentiveness. We’re all in this together, and it’s wonderful to be a part of a sisterhood that helps me make good choices.

Parental Law vs. God's Law

I visited church in Myrtle Beach this past Sunday, and after hearing two wonderful talks by youth speakers, I heard a thought provoking and inspiring one by one of the church leaders. His remarks centered around the importance of obeying the commandments IF we want to receive the associated blessings.

Greg spoke of some the similarities and differences between parental love and God’s love, and as I listened, I thought of how children will often wail, “That’s not fair!” when they perceive that they’re being treated unjustly or that a sibling is receiving a privilege that they aren’t. Too, sometimes they want things (privileges, treats, allowance) even if they don’t deserve them. Adults are often the same way. We want raises, promotions, special projects, compliments, and so forth, but often we aren’t willing to pay the price to get them.

Back to the children, sometimes parents give in and give them what they want. Sometimes they just want the children to be quiet and stop whining, and other times they “feel sorry” for the precious little angels. But is that really right? Brother Stalvey gave the example of how an adult child in a cohabitating relationship might complain that his parents don't treat him the same as their married children. They look at eternal laws and feel that what they want to do is more important. Greg wasn’t making any pronouncements about how parents should handle their children; he was, however, pretty adamant about consequences of disobedience to God’s laws.

We as adults can weep and wail and gnash our teeth, but we need to understand that God’s laws are fair, just, and contingent upon following the commandments. We cannot steal, kill, commit adultery, live in cohabitating relationships, or abuse our children and expect God to turn the other cheek. While He loves us just like we love our children, He practices a tough love. But wow, look at the stupendous blessings if we only do what He asks.

Brother Stalvey also mentioned the woman at the well story, one of my favorites. Christ spoke with her despite the fact that she was a woman, a Samaritan one at that. Her gender made no difference to Him. Unless I'm mistaken, she was the first person whom Christ actually informed of His true identify. At the same time, He also let her know that He knew her past (five husbands) and present (living with a man). What I read into this scenario is that even though He loved her, He wasn't going to just "let her off the hook."

It's the same for us. While God loves us unconditionally, it's understood that we can't have several partners (today's term of choice) and expect him not to know and to someday "call us on it." We can't expect "the law" to save us when we have ignored eternal commandments. It's all about choices and consequences. While we're free to choose the former, we're not free to choose the latter.

I surely don't mean for my posts to come across as preachy, pious pontifications (how's that for alliteration?). During Sunday's talk, I had one of those "aha" experiences, and this morning I'm merely trying to convey it to you.

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Not so Perfect

I’m one of the most fortunate people in the world. I have friends from all walks of life who offer support, encouragement, advice, and FUN. I don’t hang around with naysayers, at least not for long. I’m a firm believer that you can’t bring someone into the light by stepping into the darkness with them (an idea I picked up from Stephen Covey). Consequently, I try to surround myself with positive people. Connie is one of them.

The other night we met at Chili’s to share a belated birthday dinner, and we had a great conversation. We touched on children, grandchildren, aging, husbands, fashion, and yes…gospel principles. While she and I both strive to walk the straight path and to be as loving, accepting, and understanding as possible, we realize that we aren’t perfect. We also realize that no one is. Why then, do some people think they are and proceed to find fault with less than perfect people like Jayne and Connie?

We’re all at different places in our spiritual development. Some have no problems with paying tithing but can’t seem to pay a compliment to a spouse or child who might be starving for a kind word. Is it easier to write a check than give attention to loved ones? Some people keep the Sabbath holy and would rather go hungry than buy a loaf of bread on Sunday. There’s nothing wrong with that, but I’ve heard some of these folks made snide and snarly remarks to others. Some people would never dream of drinking a glass of sweet tea, but might weigh an extra 50 or 60pounds. I recall hearing someone make disparaging remarks about a woman who often left church early (tsk tsk), but little did they know that she left to prepare and take meals to an elderly couple in her neighborhood.

I hope I don’t appear self-righteous or judgmental. I’m just saying that we’re all on different places in our spiritual development path, and that our job is to encourage, support, and help each other rather than bring them down or thwart their progress. If someone is slipping and sliding in the mud, lend a hand. If she has rocks in her path that keep tripping her up, help her kick them out of the way. If she’s weary and the path seems long and arduous, sit down beside her and rest a moment.

Here’s another Covey phrase: Be a candle, not a critic; be a light, not a judge. Sure am glad I have lots of candles and lights in my life. I can do without the judges and critics. Can’t you?

Sexual Harassment?

Somewhere on this blog, there’s probably already a post about Bathsheba. Remember her? She’s the one whom King David took a liking to and ordered to come to his palace. She, being one of his subjects, did as she was told. According to the scriptures, the king had seen her bathing on the rooftop one night and felt a powerful attraction. Conveniently, her husband was away at war, and for some reason, David had opted not to accompany his men on this venture. Home in Jerusalem, perhaps he was having a bout of insomnia. Who knows?

What we do know is that Bathsheba did as she was bidden. He was the boss, right? As the story goes, they later paid a big price for their indiscretion since Uriah was sent to the battle front to be killed. Then too, David and Bathsheba’s first child died. What I pick up from the scriptures about David’s feelings about the whole situation is that he was filled with remorse and sorrow for what he had done. Not only had he committed adultery with another woman’s wife, but he had also had her husband killed.

There’s also the fact that Bathsheba had little or no choice in the matter. She could have declined his invitation, but at what price? I think she probably considered her alternatives and did as she was told. Maybe she thought pleasing David would help Uriah in his military career.

This afternoon it occurred to me that Bathsheba was caught in a situation not unlike that of women everywhere who experience sexual harassment from those in power. Although we have laws protecting women from unwanted advances and hostile environments, it no doubt continues in many workplaces. Men may rationalize and feel that they’re entitled to certain privileges. They may even protest to those who advise against such behavior and say that there’s “really nothing to it.” “It’s innocent,” they might insist.

As my sweet mama used to say, “If you play with fire, you’re gonna get burned.” Yes, I’m on my soapbox this evening. It is NEVER right to take advantage of a woman over whom you have power. Being a “boss” doesn’t mean you have to right to boss someone around. It means you need to “man up” and be a leader, a person who can influence another for good, not someone who’s going to lead both parties down a twisted path. This is especially true if the man in question is married. In fact, if either party is married, walk away from the fire.

Enough said.

Dig a Little Deeper

Early mornings are my quiet times. They’re almost sacrosanct, and I don’t want to hear television, radio, or even a human voice until I’ve had some quiet moments to read something uplifting and write in my journal. One particular morning, however, I clicked on the television to check the weather…something I never do. While trying to find the weather channel, I discovered a female televangelist talking about something that interested me.

Intrigued by her manner and message, I actually plopped down on the couch to hear what she had to say. Holding something black and somewhat ugly in her hands, she proceeded to turn the substance around to reveal something beautiful inside, lavender glistening rock-like material. She then went on to ponder aloud why God would put something so lovely deep within something so unappealing. To get to the treat within, someone had to dig a little deeper, to chip at the surface until the black exterior disappeared to reveal the treasure within. I flipped the channel in search of weather news, and yet the concept stayed with me.

Diamonds, one of the hardest and most beautiful substances known to man, have to be mined. So do gold and silver. Oil, a precious commodity, is beneath the surface of the earth and must be drilled. Water is beneath the earth. This is also true with people in that you can't judge by appearances. Some fascinating, brilliant, interesting folks live behind less than glamourous facades; you just have to dig a little to discover what gems they are.

What I'm wondering this afternoon is how we can think that an understanding of gospel priniciples is going to come to us if we don't actually read, ponder, and pray. What good is it to have scriptures and other inspirational books and magazines if we never avail ourselves of them? How can we expect to know of God's will for our lives without asking Him and waiting for the answer(s)? Just beneath the surface, there are all sorts of treasures, but I think we need to dig a little deeper to discover them.

Thanks Michelle

As always (yes always), I came home from church feeling edified, inspired, and uplifted. Not only did I get to spend some time with like-minded (like-spirited) people, I also got to sing, listen, and learn. Anyone who could’ve sat through today’s Sacrament meeting and be unmoved has a heart of stone.

I’m looking forward to studying the Old Testament in Sunday school this year. When I was a child, I was captivated by the stories. How did Daniel make it in the lion’s den? Why didn’t Isaac try to get away from his father when Abraham needed a sacrifice? Wasn’t it obvious to him what might happen? How can I get the faith of Hannah? And talk about women—wow, that Esther was awesome! This year we’ll revisit some of these stories, and I know I’ll gain insight into their meaning and application to today’s world.

In Relief Society, Michelle talked about what we could be working towards as a ward this year. Beginning by saying that she’s not that crazy about resolutions, she quoted someone who said if you’re doing something wrong, why wait until January 1st to correct it? Do it now. If there’s something you need to work on, do it now too.

After a few more introductory remarks, Michelle said they (the RS Presidency in our ward) had decided that 2010 was going to be a year of service. “Let’s take the focus off of ourselves and onto others,” she suggested. After listening to several scriptures and numerous stories of service that had occurred right in our ward, I think we all felt more resolved to be a little kinder, to look out for each other, and to offer whatever type of service we could. Some people are into making casseroles while others might find arranging flowers or cleaning houses more to their liking.

How often have you intended to help someone but procrastinated, hoping someone else would take care of it? What if the Lord needs something done and He wants you to do it…but you don’t? What if you’re the person who’s the designated miracle worker, but you’re too busy watching Dancing with the Stars or shopping to make a phone call or write a quick note? Do you get caught up in the “thick of thin things?” I do.

I was pretty good about doing charitable acts during December, but just like many others, I have to work hard to overcome what I’ve heard referred to as the “seasonal belch of philanthropy.” I’m not into resolutions either so I’m not exactly “resolving” to give more service. However, I am going to try to keep that Christmas spirit of love and giving in my heart and actions all year long.

Thanks Michelle. Great lesson.