Cynthia's New Direction

Last week my cousin Cynthia told me that she was going back to school to study Christian counseling. Her nest is empty now, and this is something she feels led to do. As my brother Mike and I talked with her about it, I could immediately see that she’s passionate about this new endeavor. “There are so many women out there who are confused, abused, afraid, and depressed, and they don’t know where to turn,” she said (paraphrased).


We then began to talk a little about some of the women in the Bible who seem to reach across centuries to speak to us. Their stories are our stories. They can help us! Cynthia talked about Leah and her constant efforts to get Jacob to love her. “Maybe if I have another son, then….” No matter how many strong young sons she produced, Jacob preferred the beautiful Rachel, Leah’s sister. Not that Rachel had a smooth road either. Longing for a child, she was reminded daily of her barren condition as she saw Leah's sons. At long last, she was rewarded with Joseph and later Benjamin. Unfortunately, complications of childbirth took her life, and she didn’t have the opportunity to raise this child.

I brought up Rilpah and how she mourned for her dead sons. Esther and her courage crossed my mind; so did Vashti, her predecessor, who refused to parade before the king and his drunken friends. Cynthia mentioned Naomi and how she’s often overlooked in favor of her daughter-in-law Ruth. As Cynthia reminded us, Naomi was a woman who had lost her husband and sons and felt that her life was over, and yet….Well, read the story for yourself to learn about the direction her life took after her great losses.

I don’t know how many women there are in the Bible, and I’m disinclined to Google that tidbit of information at the moment. I do know, however, that every single one of them is there for a reason and that there is something to be learned from each story. Whether a woman is feeling angry, jealous, sad, despairing, lonely, unappreciated, afraid, unloved, overlooked, unimportant, or lost, she can find answers in the lives of the women in the scriptures.

I’m curious. Do you have a favorite story about a woman in the Bible? Why? What have you learned from her? How has this story helped you to cope with a situation?

P.S. The young women in the  picture are my beautiful daughters and nieces, and  I hope they always remember where to look for answers.

Waiting and Watching

Mothers spent a lot of time watching and waiting. An instance that comes to mind this afternoon is of an evening when I sat outside in a cold car waiting for my son Paul to come out of the warm church building so that we could go home. Well, the car wasn’t actually cold since I had the heater turned on. It was the outside that was frigid, and the longer I sat there watching him and his friends having a super time inside of the warm, lighted building, the more annoyed I became.

I had things to do! There were unwashed dishes in the sink, clothes to iron, and classes to prepare for! When in the world was he ever going to come out?! Dressed in the sweat pants I’d earlier jogged in, I didn’t feel comfortable going inside to get him, especially since I’d exchanged my Nikes for some fluffy bedroom shoes. I decided to call my mother and whine a little bit. Surely she’d commiserate with my plight. Wrong! A wise woman, she listened to my complaint and simply said, “He’s worth waiting for.” I felt as though I’d been slapped and hugged at the same time! She was absolutely right. He was well worth waiting for, and he was inside of a church building for crying out loud (a phrase she might have added).

Part of what mothers are supposed to do is watch and wait. And yet what I did is minimal when compared to the vigil of a woman I just learned about this week. Her name was Rizpah, and you can read all about her in II Samuel 21:2-14. Although she’s not a major player like some of the other Old Testament mothers, her story is certainly one worth telling.

A concubine of Saul, Rizpah had two sons named Armoni and Mephibosheth. At some point before his death, Saul had ordered the slaying of some Gibeonites, and now these people were demanding retribution. King David was anxious to appease them because he felt it would end a three-year famine. Unfortunately, the Gibeonites didn’t want money; they wanted blood, the blood of seven of Saul’s descendents. Two of these young men were the sons of Rizpah, and the other five were sons of Michal, Saul’s daughter.

David handed these seven over to the Gibeonites to be slain as human sacrifices. After the slaying, their bodies were not buried as was the custom of the day, but were left to the elements. Rizpah knew she had to take a stand not only to protect their bodies from birds and beasts but also to influence David to bury them. Bold and faithful, she basically took sackcloth, spread it on a rock, and sat there keeping watch from the beginning of barley season until nearly six months later, from April to October. Eventually, King David heard of her tenacious loyalty and buried what was left of the seven bodies. Only then did Rizpah leave the rock.

Compare Rizpah’s wait to mine. She sat on a rock and braved the elements in all sorts of weather for SIX MONTHS. What did she eat? Did friends come and visit her and offer social support? Did she bathe, change her clothes, sleep? I waited 20 minutes in the comfort of my car while I watched my very alive son enjoy his friends inside of a warm building. Rizpah’s sons were dead. I called my mother; Rizpah didn’t call anyone. The very thought of her using a cell phone is weird. As far as we know, she was totally alone.

I’m not sure what we’re supposed to get from the story, but I know it’s in the scriptures for a reason. I’m thinking that although it isn’t always easy, mothers have to take a stand. We have to watch and wait and shoo away all the vultures that might attack our children, and we need to do it by night and by day.

Rizpah loved her children with a fierce love, and her behavior showed valor and loyalty. She was a person of no power, a concubine, and yet her actions moved a king to do the right thing and bury the remains of the bodies. Not coincidentally, after the burial, the rains came.

What are some applications of this story to your life today?

Unnamed but Important

Since I’ve become interested in the women of the Bible and the many lessons they can teach us, I’ve realized that these lessons can come from every single woman, not just the major players like Eve, Esther, and Mary.  Even those whose names aren’t specifically mentioned in the scriptures, like the woman at the well or the woman caught in adultery, have a message to impart.

The unnamed woman I’m thinking of today is found in Matthew 15: 22-28, a Gentile who dared to ask Christ to heal her daughter. She cried unto Him and asked Him to have mercy upon her and to heal her daughter who was vexed with a devil. At first, Christ doesn’t answer her, and the disciples ask Him to send her away. Jesus allows her to speak, but His response is a bit surprising (at least to me), for he tells her that it isn’t “meet” to take the children’s bread and cast it to the dogs. Whether he really thinks that she’s on the level of a dog getting crumbs from beneath the table, I don’t know. What I do know is that her behavior exhibits faith, courage, humility, respect, persistence, and love.

Christ comments specifically on the Canaanite woman’s faith. “O woman, great is thy faith: be it unto thee even as thou wilt.” Her other attributes are manifestations of this unwavering faith. If a person has faith, then she will ask and then ask again, boldly confident that her request will be granted. This brave woman is my new role model because of her many traits like:

Courage: Don’t you just know she was wary of approaching the Savior? As a Gentile, she had to be a little apprehensive about it, and yet if she let her fears keep her from making her humble request, her daughter would continue to be “vexed.” I used to (and still do!) tell my children: ALWAYS ASK! If you don’t ask, the answer is NO. Even if you do ask, it might still be no, but it might also be yes.

Humility and Respect: Realizing her humble status and His divine one, she called Him “O Lord, thou Son of David,” and later “Lord.” Do I really need to say more about this? He's the Master of ocean, earth, and sky; you're a human being. He deserves our utmost respect.

Persistence: When Christ told her that it wasn’t meet to take the children’s bread and cast it to the dogs, she didn’t slink away. Instead, she persevered and reminded him that dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master’s table. We need to persist, to stand at the door and knock and knock and knock. Some people give up almost right away when their petitions aren't granted. Whether it's a request to our Creator or one to a boss, friend, child, parent, or any other mortal, we need to keep at it.

Love: Her child was suffering. If she, the mother, didn’t beseech help on her part, who would? I’d venture to say that the well-being and safety of our children comprise a large part of parents’ prayers. Even if they’re estranged from us or walking a crooked path, we are still under obligation to pray for them.

This humble Gentile woman asked in faith, and Christ granted her request. Although he didn’t immediately turn towards her with open arms as He did with so many who sought His favors, He recognized her faith and the other virtues related to it and answered her petition. I think I’m going to follow her example, starting now.

Vashti Said No

Today I saw a young man with his jeans so low that I caught more than a glimpse of his blue anded plaid boxer shorts. I wonder if this is a new trend, having your under garments coordinate with your outer ones. Seems like I read a couple of years ago that women’s bra straps should blend or at least complement tank top colors. Gee whiz. Why not just make sure the under garments stay underneath???

All these sights have reminded me of Queen Vashti in the book of Esther. Everyone applauds Esther (and rightly so) for her courage in going before King Ahasuerus, but rarely do people have much to say about Vashti, the lady who sat on the throne before Esther came on the scene. Vashti, like Esther, risked everything she had in her communication with the king, and she paid a big price for it.

In a nutshell, there had been much merrymaking in the land for quite a while, 100 and fourscore days. After this time, Ahasuerus held yet another weeklong feast, one for the men and one for the women. From what I can glean from the scriptures, there was drinking and revelry among the men. On the 7th day, the king sent for his queen, Vashti, so that she could “shew the people and the princes her beauty.” She refused, and the king was “very wroth.”

I wasn’t there, and my only information is from the scriptures themselves and from some commentaries that I’ve read. My understanding of the events, however, is that perhaps Ahasuerus intended for Vashti to parade around in front of the drunken crowd. Rather than expose herself to leering gawkers, she said no. It would have been easier for her to go along, to be a good sport, but Vashti was courageous enough to say no. She must have known that there would be a consequence, but it didn’t matter. The scriptures tell us that anger burned in Ahasuerus, and at the prompting of his advisors, he gave her “royal estate to another.”

It might be a stretch, but I can see the application of the principles of modesty and courage in the world today. Why do people, men and women alike, bare shoulders, breasts, and midriffs for any and everyone to view? Why do young men feel the need to have their undies showing? Is it because of the need to be fashionable and to fit in? Doesn’t it take more courage to cover up and say NO to the wearing of revealing apparel than to give in to the popular trends of today?

What price will you pay to keep your throne? Will you say no to immodesty and immorality even if it costs you your popularity? Or will you go along with the world’s “look” to be accepted and popular?

Lily-livered is the Merriam Webster word of the day. Don’t you just love it? It has so much more punch than that cowardly or weak. It’s right up there with spineless and gutless, and I can’t help but notice how those two adjectives, like lily-livered, are also related to the body. The reason the term impressed me so much is that lately I’ve been thinking more about all of the courageous women in the Bible…and all of the injunctions we’re given to be brave.

I have a busy day ahead of me so I’ll just mention two or three. Queen Esther heads my list, and anyone who’s read very much of this blog won’t be surprised by that. Risking her life, she went before the king to request a favor, and as a consequence she saved the Jewish people. Oh, and the bad guy got killed. Think what might have happened if she hadn’t squared her shoulders and said, “If I perish, I perish.”

Then there’s the woman in the New Testament who risked ridicule and censure as she made her way through the crowd to touch the hem of Christ’s robe. After suffering from an issue of blood for twelve years, she was willing to feel the fear and do it anyway. We usually think of faith as being her primary virtue, but I can see that it took courage to do this. And what did Christ do? He somehow felt her touch and turned to the crowd to ask who had touched the robe. She could have slunk off, but no, “she came trembling” (Luke 8:47) and fell down before Him. She was healed immediately and gently told to go in peace.

Although there are dozens of brave women in the scriptures, there’s just one more that I have time to mention this morning, a very young woman named Mary. The older I get, the more amazed I am at the courage, faith, and humility of the mother of Christ. In my wildest dreams, I can’t imagine being visited by an angel telling me that I’m going to be the mother of the Savior of mankind. Mary was a young teenager who never “known” a man. I don’t know what her parents had to say about the situation. I have a hard enough time imagining the conversation with Joseph.

We all feel fearful from time to time. Sometimes we need courage to speak up for ourselves, and sometimes we need to speak for those who have no voice (in a manner of speaking). Sometimes we need to ask for help, healing, or a hand, and at other times we just need to do what our Creator asks us to do. Don’t be lily-livered. Just do it!

Thanks, Mr. Tyndale

Sunday’s Relief Society lesson went well if I do say so myself, not because of anything I did but because of two other reasons: the topic itself and the people in the class. Scripture study was the topic, and class members were as attentive and participative as always. They’re such a delightful group that I think if I said, “Today the lesson’s about the 12 tribes of Israel, and I’m feeling a little inadequate,” they’d come to my rescue…not because they’re a room of know-it-alls and show-offs but because they know why we’re there: to love, encourage, and support one another. After all, they're Eve's sisters.

The lesson was about scripture(s), and as I began to read and prepare, I was amazed at the things I learned and the things I was reminded of. Admittedly, I often take the scriptures for granted. I think most people do. Yet there was a time in the not too far distant past when ordinary people like us didn’t have access to the Bible, much less any other books of scripture.

In my preparation, I learned of a man named William Tyndale who was strangled and then burned at the stake for translating and publishing the Bible in English. This happened in 1536, not even 500 years ago, and while that seems like a long time, it really isn’t. An educated man, Tyndale spoke eight languages and was a member of the Catholic clergy. Distressed that the common man had no access to the scriptures, Tyndale sought church approval to translate the Bible into English. After being denied approval, he fled to Germany, and with the help of friends, translated and published the Old and New Testaments and smuggled published copies into England. Tyndale’s work is the foundation for the King James Version of Bible.

William Tyndale isn’t the only person to whom we owe a debt of gratitude, but he’s the one I’m thinking of this afternoon. I’m thinking of how this man was willing to sacrifice his life because of his unwavering commitment to make the words of God available for all people…or at least the English speaking ones. And yet today many people take this great book for granted…or perhaps don’t even realize its importance. It sits on a shelf gathering dust instead of enlightening the minds of its owners.

Today we not only have the King James Version of the Bible, but we also have several other versions. On my shelf is a version of the New Testament entitled The Message which reads like a narrative. I also have a copy of the Women’s Devotional Bible, a gift from my sister. Being LDS, I have copies of The Book of Mormon, The Doctrine and Covenants, and the Pearl of Great Price. I can also access the words from all of these books (and many more) online. Heck, I can even have daily scripture messages sent to my hotmail address, and they show up on my cell phone. How convenient is that? I truly have no excuse not to read and ponder.

It occurs to me that one of the reasons the scriptures are so readily available is that perhaps God is trying to send us a message. Maybe He thinks we need instruction, inspiration, guidance, and peace more than ever. I love the Young Women’s theme this year, probably because of the encouragement it offers. The theme comes from Joshua 1:9, and it fills me with hope. “Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”

Be strong. Be tough. Be strong. You’re not alone…not ever.

Following Brooke

I doubt if anyone who attended Fast and Testimony Meeting in our ward Sunday came away unmoved. If so, I have to think that he or she has a cold, cold heart or serious struggles with “the adversary.” One of the things I love so much about these meetings is that I get to learn what’s in the hearts of others…how they really feel about life, their families, and of course the gospel of Jesus Christ. Some people express gratitude, and others share struggles and concerns.

Time prohibits a full account of all of the testimonies I heard, so I’ll just share a couple that are on my mind today. Let’s start with yours truly. I had actually forgotten that it was F & T Sunday until I arrived, and as soon as I was reminded of it, I thought something like, “Oh great. I love to hear what my fellow church members have to say.” Almost instantly, I recalled something I’d read in one of Henry B. Eyring’s books about listening to others, something about how God will speak to you when and if you earnestly listen to the words of others when they are speaking about Him and/or spiritual matters. It occurred to me that it’s not fair to always be on the listening side and that I needed to share my testimony with my ward family.

Anxiety kept me in my seat for about two minutes until I remembered my sweet little granddaughter Brooke. Though only 5, she often bravely walks up on the stand and tells the congregation how much she loves Jesus…and her family. What a great role model! I shared several thoughts with the congregation Sunday, but the primary one was that regardless of what kind of suffering, pain, loss, heartache, disappointment, or despair, there is only one source of solace. I don’t know the reason for so much pain and evil in the world; I only know that without some sort of faith in a Supreme Being, you’re in for a much rougher road.

*Kitty talked about the power of prayer and how she’d felt its power so many times in her life.
*Mari, a lovely young woman, began her testimony in a way that reflected my feelings to a tee. She said she had felt compelled to come to the front, and yet when she got there and saw all of the people staring at her, she thought something like, “Am I really up here? How did I get here????” Anyway, one of the many things she said that found me nodding in agreement is she knew every person there was anxious for her success and happiness, and that although she didn’t know everyone, she knew that every single person would stand behind her…and would help her if necessary. She’s right, you know. I’ve felt that unity many times.
*Then there was Willette whose words made me chuckle a little. She shared that when her son was on his mission, she and her husband Larry vowed to bring as much harmony and peace into their lives as possible. They decided to begin singing a Primary song, I’m Trying to be Like Jesus, every time either of them raised their voice, began gossiping, acting uncharitable, etc. She said she bet they sang that hymn a million times!
*Izzy spoke of her love for the gospel and her deep gratefulness of how it had come into her life.
*Joann told of some of her challenges in life and of how thoughts of Joseph Smith and his unflinching courage had often strengthened her. She shared a specific example of how painful a “tar and feather” incident had been, especially when his wife Emma unavoidably removed pieces of his flesh when peeling off the tar.

We closed the last meeting, Relief Society, with Love One Another, and I left the building buoyed up by the music, words, hugs, smiles, talks, lessons, and prayers of the morning. It’s only Tuesday, and I’ve been annoyed and irritated plenty of times since then. But you know what? I think of Willette and Larry singing and find myself humming the tune to their song.

Scared Heart?

I’ve been listening to Sue Monk Kidd’s The Mermaid Chair on CD, and one of the few things that I like about this book is one of Jessie’s memory of a conversation she once had with her daughter. As a child, her daughter Dee thought the church Mary of the Sacred Heart was really Mary of the Scared Heart. Jessie, the mom, is remembering that conversation years later and thinking about whether Mary was scared or not. After all, she thinks, “scared heart” might just as much sense as “sacred heart.”

Amanda’s having a baby. She’s my daughter-in-law, and I’m super excited about this baby. I don’t even know this little one yet, the tiny fetus that we’re referring to as Baby C, and yet I’m already thinking about him or her. Amanda saw the little one actively swimming about during her sonogram Monday, and she excitedly told me about how he or she was moving its little “nubs,” future arms and legs. Is it a boy or a girl? Will the baby be tall, short, blue-eyed, curly-haired, athletic, scientific, musically inclined, a great dancer???

While I’m excited, I can’t help but feel a twinge of anxiety from time to time. Will Amanda’s pregnancy and labor be smooth and uneventful? Will Baby C have all ten fingers and toes? While I know that it's coming to a home with parents “kind and dear,” will they know how to handle a colicky baby? One of my students missed a test today because her baby is in the hospital with a fever of 104. What if that happens to Paul and Amanda’s baby?

All of this (and more) has got me thinking more about Mary. Was she scared? She surely had reason to be. She was a child by some standards, probably no older than 16. Plus, as far as I can determine, it’s not as though she had the love and support of her parents. Elisabeth seems to be the only person she felt comfortable enough to confide in, at least at first. Eventually she had to face Joseph, her betrothed. Do you think she was scared to tell him? I do. She had had a visit from Gabriel, but so far Joseph had not. Here she is an unmarried teenager without support or encouragement, and she’s having a baby. Don’t you know the town gossipers had a heyday with that? There weren’t hospitals around either. The longer I think about this, the more I realize that indeed she may have been petrified. Yes, the angel had said, “Be not afraid,” but still….

Here's the scariest part (to me): Mary was carrying the literal Son of God, the Savior of the world. Can you even imagine such a feeling? I can’t. Amanda is carrying a child of God, and while I know there may be times when she too might feel a little fearful or anxious, she has the love and support of family and friends. She also lives in a time and place where there’s the best medical care possible. Oh, and of course there’s the fact that she’ married to Paul, a man who will surely magnify his role as a father.

Tamar's Courage

A few months ago I was so impressed with Esther and her courage that I wrote several posts about her. I saw her as a valiant woman who was so brave that she risked her life in the fight to save her people. I’m still impressed with her, but the more I read and ponder the women of the bible, the more I realize that she wasn’t the only courageous one. Tonight I’m thinking about Tamar, Judah’s daughter-in-law, the one he conveniently forgot about and sent back to her father’s house. It was sort of a “don’t call me, I’ll call you” arrangement.

But first a little background.Her first husband, Judah’s son Er, was dead. After Er died, Judah instructed his second son, Onan, to sleep with Tamar in order to provide her with a male offspring. It seems weird to us in this day and time, but it was part of the levirate marriage agreement, sort of a security net for young widows. A child would provide Tamar with someone who would take care of her in old age. Although Onan seemed to comply, he practiced coitus interruptus. After all, if Tamar had conceived, Onan’s share of the inheritance would be reduced.

With two sons dead, Judah has only one son left, and this is where the plot thickens. He promises Tamar that when young Shelah matures, he will send for her so that Shelah can perform his brotherly duty. Time passes, and when Judah reneges on his promise, Tamar realizes that she has to do something. If not, her fate as a powerless, penniless widow seems certain.

What does she do? She takes off her widow’s weeds and goes to Timnah, a town where Judah is heading to shear sheep. Tamar disguises herself as a harlot and sits waiting for him to arrive, hoping to entice him to engage her services. Now a widower, Judah notices Tamar, and they are intimate with each other. To make this story seem even more bizarre (to me anyway), he doesn’t even recognize his daughter-in-law. While it’s true that Judah probably never saw her face, you’d think that perhaps he’d have recognized her voice when she spoke to him of the signet, bracelets, and staff that he was to leave with her.

You know how this story ends. Tamar conceives, and when Judah hears that Tamar is pregnant from playing the harlot, he sentences her to death without even seeing her. When he learns that he’s the father of her unborn children (actually two of them), he states that she is more righteous than he. Judah knows that not only has he not lived up to his end of the bargain but also that he was as guilty as Tamar when it comes to “whoredoms.”

Whether the story has a happy ending is a matter of perspective. There was no happy-ever-after marriage, and yet Judah “steps up to the plate,” and Tamar secures her rightful place in the family. She gives birth to twins, one of whom (Pharez) is an ancestor of Boaz. Tamar is in the genealogy of Christ.
To me, that’s a remarkable story, even more so when I ponder Tamar’s courage. Her choices were to stay forever in her father’s house, not free to remarry, or to take matters into her own hands. Still, it was risky. What if Judah had recognized her and punished her on the spot? What if she hadn’t conceived? What if Judah said the bracelets, signet, and staff weren’t his? Not to mention the fact that she had to be intimate with her father-in-law!

How courageous are you? How far would you go to secure your future? Would you risk everything?

Absolute Last Esther Post

This is it about Esther, my absolute last post…for a while at least. There’s so much to ponder in this short book, so many lessons. Although there aren’t that many people in the book, each adds a little something. Without going into detail, here are a few of the topics I’ve come up with:

Faith and putting faith into action.
Fulfilling one’s destiny.
Dangers of pride (look at what happened to Haman).
Dressing for success. Remember how Esther appeared before the king in her royal robes?
Respect for those in charge.
Fasting and praying…and the strength that can come from others who are united in these actions.
The magnitude of what one brave, committed person can do.
Knowing that things can change overnight. You just never know when you lay your head on the pillow at night what might happen by morning. Maybe the king will have insomnia.
The importance of fighting for your people; this includes your spouse, children, parents, siblings, friends, and everyone else you'd consider "your people."
The necessity of having courage. Can you just picture Esther standing before the king, perhaps shaking in her royal shoes?
The scariness of having “friends” like Haman. Just how loyal were these fair weather friends?
The importance of straight talk and tough love. Remember how Mordecai sent word to Esther reminding her that if she didn’t act, help would come from some other place but that she would not be spared.
The importance of using what you’ve been given, whether it’s looks, leadership skills, cunning, or know-how.
The underlying sense that we are all Esthers in our own spheres and that we have been born for such as time as this.

Can you think of other themes or lessons?

True or False?

I have friends from all walks of life, some rich and some poor, some old and some young, some male and some female, some Christian and some agnostic. Lately, I’ve been thinking about a couple of my friends in the latter category. The stories in the Old Testament disturb them, and they’re unable to reconcile the God of the Old Testament to the one of the New Testament. How can a loving god destroy Job’s family and cover him with boils? How can He ask Isaac to sacrifice his son or allow Lot’s daughters to sleep with him after getting him drunk?

Ladies, I don’t know the answer to those questions. All I know is that all of the answers to all of life’s problems, issues, and mysteries can be found in the scriptures. As anyone knows who’s been reading this blog lately, I’m fascinated with the book of Esther. As a young friend of mine said, “Esther’s the bomb!” Yes, she certainly is. And so are you.

Any woman who reads and ponders this book will surely see parallels between Esther’s life and her own. We might not have the power to save our people on such a grand scale, but we all have “people” we can help. We can all fast and pray and get more in tune with the Spirit. We can all fight the good fight and do our best to destroy evil. We can all be assured that no matter how scary things appear, life can “turn on a dime.” In less than a week, Esther went from being a pampered recluse who hadn’t been summoned by her husband in 30 days to becoming Queen Esther with a capital Q. Because of her bravery and faith, Haman was killed, Mordecai was elevated, and the Jews were saved.

More on Esther later. For now, I just want to comment that trying to argue with God or against him is pointless. As C.S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity, “But there is a difficulty about disagreeing with God. He is the source from which all your reasoning power comes; you could not be right and He wrong anymore than a stream can rise higher than its own source. When you are arguing against Him you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all: it is like cutting off the branch you are sitting on.”

In a nutshell, it’s cuckoo to argue about the being who gave you your mind.

Reclusive Esther

What’s so good about being a queen if you can’t even wear your crown? Put yourself in Esther's place. You can wear the crown but only in certain areas, areas that don’t count. Basically, you’re a recluse who doesn’t even get to see the king very regularly. He’s your husband, yes, but you can’t see him unless he decides that he wants to see you which evidently isn’t all that often. After all, he has plenty of other pretty ladies to keep him company and hasn’t sent for you in 30 days. And you can’t even say anything to him about his infidelities. It’s not as if you have any power, any voice. You’re so sheltered that you don’t even know there’s a plan to kill all of your people within the year.

Fast forward to 2009 in another country, a culture far different from ancient Persia...America. I’m trying to imagine First Lady Michelle Obama being kept apart from her husband, but I can't. People seem to be as interested in her as they are in him…and not just in her fashion choices but also in her ideas, philosophies, and plans. She has a voice and is recognized as an savvy, intelligent, articulate, beautiful woman. Just check out March's issue of Vogue if you don't believe me.

Can the two women be more different in their lifestyles and "queendoms?" Yet both of them were/are thrust into positions requiring decision making and courage. Michelle might fear making a misstep, saying the wrong thing at the wrong place to the wrong people, but I don't think she fears for her life. Esther feared for her own life and those of her people.

I'm going to put some more thought into Esther's very real and legitimate fears and how she was able to act despite them. I know there are more lessons in her courageous behavior than I've mentioned. For starters, have you ever decided something that changed the course of your entire life and perhaps that of your family's?

Be Brave

In last night's class on Esther, we were asked if we knew what the most frequent command in the Bible was. Not certain, I kept quiet…and so did everyone else. I thought it might be something akin to “Love one another,” but I was dead wrong. The most frequent command in the Old and New Testaments is “Don’t be afraid.” I was surprised, shocked actually. If it wasn’t about loving and serving others or bridling our tongues, then surely it was about some sin or another. But no, some version of “Fear not” is the most common instruction from Genesis through Revelations.

Beth Moore, the person who wrote the materials for the course on Esther, has also produced a series of videos that accompany the workbook. They are marvelous, and she is phenomenally inspiring. Last night she asked her audience to think of the thing(s) they were most afraid of in the world. Was it illness? Old age? Alzheimer’s? What about something happening to one of your children? Or what about your husband or sweetheart losing interest in you? What if, what if, what if????

She then walked us through this scenario. “What if my husband becomes less attracted to me? What if he finds another woman, someone prettier and smarter and younger? What if my children like her? I’ll just die, that’s what I’ll do. And I’ll weep and wail and have a hissy fit. I’ll go to bed and not get up for weeks. I’ll never get over it. Never. I’ll be sad and mad for the rest of my life. I’ll try to poison him. I’ll slit her tires. Then I’ll scream and cry some more. And then I’ll brush off my shoulders and go back to work.”

Ms. Moore then asked us to look at our workbooks and fill in the blanks of this phrase: “And if __________, then _________. “ I think just about all of us started to put “I perish” in both of the empty blanks since those were Esther’s words. However, we were told to write one of our worst fears and then “God ” in the second one.

If my husband leaves me, then God.
If something happens to one of my children, then God.
If I lose my job, then God.
If I receive a fatal diagnosis from my doctor, then God.
If I go into labor and my doctor is out of town, then God. (this one’s for Carrie)

God doesn’t promise that He won’t let “bad” things happen sometimes or that trouble will never visit you, but He does promise that HE WILL BE WITH YOU. He says, “Trust me, not trust me not to let it happen but TRUST ME.”

As I watched and listened to the video, I was spellbound. As DH can attest, I’m a worry wart, especially when it comes to my children. What if Carrie goes into labor while Rich is at work? What if Elizabeth gets in an accident on her way home tonight? What if Paul gets in an accident as he maneuvers the extremely busy highways in and around Atlanta? And don't even get me started with the grandchildren! What if?? IF __________, then God.

“Be brave. Be brave. Be brave” Beth (I don't think she'd object to the first name basis) said three times with feeling. Honestly, I don’t think there was a woman there who was unmoved.

My daughter Carrie is days (maybe hours) away from delivering her baby boy, and as the days pass, she’s becoming increasingly anxious. What if the doctor is not on call? What if he’s out of town? What if they can’t make it to Savannah on time? What if someone who’s lined up to help with the children can’t come over while she’s in the hospital?

I called her this morning and told her about last night’s lesson and reminded her that IF __________, THEN GOD. He’s with her now and will be then. She just needs to have courage and fear not…and so does her mother. Be brave Carrie. Be brave.

Vashti and Esther

My sister-in-law Karen and I were chatting about her many goings-on the other evening, and she mentioned a Bible study that she’s participating in. I asked her what she was studying, and when she said Esther, that really aroused my interest.

“I really don’t know that much about her,” I said. “All I know is that she was the one who married the king after he divorced his wife, the one who wouldn’t come out and show herself to a group of male revelers.”

“Can you blame her?” Karen asked. “Some people wonder if the king expected Vashti to come out wearing nothing but a crown. After all, he was ‘merry with wine.’”

As Karen and I talked some more, I realized that I actually knew more than I thought I did…but not as much as I want to know. So tonight I’m taking the plunge. I’m going to First Baptist to learn more about Queen Esther, the queen who was brave enough risk her life to save her people. Her words, if I recall (too lazy to get out my scriptures) correctly, were, “If I perish, I perish.” I’m also hoping to learn more about Vashti, the queen who said no to the king’s request. She must have been one brave lady, and I think there’s a lesson or two to be learned from her as well.

The scriptures are replete with these wonderful, meaty stories, and all of them (in my opinion) contain layers of lessons. Right now I'm thinking of Vashti's refusal. Was she anxious about repercussions? Was she arrogant? Did the other women applaud her refusal to go before the king, or were they afraid for her? Is there a message there for women today?

Time is short. I need to get ready "for class." I just love taking classes and learning new things and gaining insight, especially into spiritual matters.