Solomon's Women

I have tremendous respect for the women in the Bible. The more I read and ponder, the more I can see them in me. They weren’t perfect, and neither am I. Just like the women of today, Rachel, Esther, and Hannah all had their challenges and trials, and all showed great faith in the choices they made and the lives they led.


This post, however, isn’t about one of the major players. It’s about “nobodies,” the 1,000 women who were King Solomon’s wives or concubines. As I go about my daily life, I often stop and think about how much freedom I have…how much “everything” I have.

• I can pretty much come and go whenever I want to. Could these women leave the palace grounds, or were their lives restricted to the royal residence?

• I have my own home that I can decorate any way that I choose, even if it means having canary yellow walls and cobalt blue leather furniture. Did these women even have their own rooms?

• I have three wonderful children and six grandchildren. Did these women have children? Were they allowed to raise them, or was it sort of a communal project?

• When the wives and concubines became older, were they “dismissed” and never summoned into the king’s presence? Did Solomon provide a pension of sorts for his older wives?

• I have a career that continues to bring a lot of satisfaction, fulfillment, and even fun into my life. Although teaching gets stressful and taxing at times, the positives far outnumber the negatives. What did these 1,000 women do all day every day??? Could they even read?

I’m thankful that I was born in America, the best nation on Earth, during the latter part of the 19th century after so many courageous women had paved the way for me to have an easier, more fulfilling life. Had I been born even 100 years earlier, I think I might have stomped around angry and frustrated and powerless. Had I been one of Solomon’s chosen women, I think I would have shriveled up and died.

Which is Harder?

Time is short this morning since my to-do list  is rather lengthy. Yes, even on MLK day, there are things to accomplish. True, the items are walking on the beach, reading my Kindle, and joining one of my daughters for lunch, and while those activities aren't exactly the same as "barges to load and bales to lift," they’re of great importance to me. But I digress.

At church yesterday, we were discussing sacrifice, and of course several Bible stories were included as examples. Time prohibits the discussion of all of them, so I’m including three of the primary ones.
First is the story of Abraham’s willingness to kill his beloved son Isaac. Remember, he and Sarah were advanced in years when this child entered their lives. Abraham was 100! You know his heart was hurting all the way to Mount Moriah where he finally tied his son down, ready to do what God had bidden. At the last moment, an angel intervened, and Isaac's life was spared. I’ve often wondered if Sarah knew where her husband and only son were heading when they left the homestead that morning.

Then there was the story of the rich young ruler who wanted to follow Christ. He was apparently a good man who followed the commandments. However, when Christ told him that he’d have to give up everything that he owned, he couldn’t do it. Could you??? I’m not even rich, and I don’t think I could do it. I mean, everything????

And finally there’s the story of the widow’s mite. She literally gave everything she had. What faith! What trust she had to sacrifice everything for the Lord. While I’ve always admired her sacrifice, I must admit that I’ve also felt a bit uneasy with the story, primarily because I don’t think I could do it. I don’t think I could give up everything.

In two of the three stories, the principal characters were willing to sacrifice BIG TIME. In the other, the rich ruler was willing to live a life of integrity but he simply could not give up his material possessions. While we were all pondering Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice Isaac, someone brought up the question of whether it was harder for a rich person to sacrifice everything than for a poor person (like the widow). I voted yes, but several people disagreed. They felt it would be far more difficult for a poor person since she had so little to begin with.

I’m not trying to settle an argument. There are no right and wrong answers. Both stories are in the Bible, and both are given as illustrations of sacrifice and commitment. It’s been my experience that people who have fewer material possession are often more humble. They seek God’s guidance and inspiration in their daily lives and realize that without Him, they’re sunk. At the same time, many wealthy people forget the sources of their many blessings and think they did it all themselves.

Yes, the above are both overgeneralizations. I’m just wondering what you think. Is it harder for a poor person or a rich person to sacrifice all he or she has? And while we’re on the subject, is sacrificing everything what God expects or is He happy with 10 percent?

Why Phyllis?

I think Dorothea and I had just had lunch at Nacho Hippo at Market Commons Friday when I got an unsettling message from Connie informing me that Phyllis was in ICU in our local hospital. Immediately, my mind conjured up an image of a beautiful woman with long, wavy blond hair and one of the sweetest faces I’ve ever seen. In recent years, she’s been struck with the BIG C, and as a result of the super strong meds, she lost her lovely tresses. I LOVED the way she looked when wearing her short strawberry blond wig, and I told her so on more than one occasion.


“You look so chic,” I’d said to her. “Plus, I can really see just how pretty your face is.”

She conquered the deadly disease, only to have it return with a vengeance, this time in her bones. Over the past several months, I’d seen her health deteriorate until finally she came to church using oxygen and sitting in a wheelchair. She was quieter, and even more serene than she had been prior to becoming sick. She seemed watchful, waiting. I admired her strength and began to feel concern for her two young children.

Saturday morning when I checked my messages on FB, the first was one from Connie informing me that Phyllis had passed away. Incredulous, I tried my best to keep the thought at bay. All day Saturday, I did entirely self-indulgent things with my family to bring in the new year, things like shopping, movie viewing, and dining out, and yet throughout the day, visions of Phyllis entered my mind. One in particular kept coming back, unbidden and a little disturbing. It was the last time I taught in Relief Society, two short weeks ago, and she sat to my right on the front row. She didn’t say anything that day, just listened intently.

Sunday morning, I opted to forgo that one last family get-together and decided to go to the beach instead. Sure hope my Christian friends don’t judge me for this, especially since the last lesson I taught was on keeping the Sabbath holy. I walked on the foggy beach for an hour and a half, and in that time I saw two horses, six dogs, 312 sea birds, and about eight people….and I listened to music on my iPod, especially hymns.

As I walked, I kept asking how this could happen to such as fine person as Phyllis. I actually got some answers, Folks. As I listened to “Where Can I Turn for Peace?” I remembered a story that Phyllis once told. She had received some disturbing family news and had passed a sleepless night. A master gardener, she arose early and went to her garden to work. She worked amongst her plants, and while pondering the news and praying for peace, she began to think, “Things will be fine. Everything will work out.” Remembering that story brought some solace.

Still, I couldn’t get her off of my mind. I just couldn’t understand how such a wonderful wife and mother could be taken from her family. Then I thought, “You can’t understand because you’re Jayne, not God. He has His reasons and is still in control here.” At that moment, a couple of verses from Isaiah came to mind, the ones about His ways and thoughts being higher than ours. It’s in Chapter 55, Verse 9: “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Everyone who knew Phyllis will miss her. At the same time, whenever I see her husband and children, remembering where she sought solace will bring some comfort. Plus, the fact that our ways are not God’s ways will bring understanding.

Lessons from Rebekah

Lately I’ve been pondering some of the stories about the women in the Bible. What were their personalities really like? What about their day-to-day lives and the decisions they made? The more I read, the more I wonder why some of them are even included. What are the lessons we’re supposed to learn from them?
Let’s take Rebekah, for instance. People name their daughters after her, and I’ve heard about the great love story between Isaac and her more times than I can recollect. Lately, however, I’ve been digging a little deeper, and I’m a little disturbed by some of my insights. I hope they’re amiss somehow and that maybe someone can shed a little more light on the subject.

On the plus side, Rebekah goes with Isaac’s servant to meet and marry a man she’s never met. Trusting God and His will for her life, she leaves her home in Nahor with a stranger and travels 500 miles to meet Isaac. That can’t have been much fun. Furthermore, she’s the mother of Jacob, the man who became the patriarch of the Twelve Tribes of Israel. But wait, isn’t she also the mother of Esau?

That brings me to the negative side. Not only did Rebekah connive with Jacob to take away Esau’s birthright, but in doing so, she also brought about a serious rift between brothers. Esau was so angry that he threatened to kill Jacob. In addition, in planning and executing this devious plan, Rebekah deceived her husband in a serious way. When Isaac discovered that he had inadvertently blessed Jacob instead of Esau, he was heartbroken; he couldn’t undo what had been done. Grieved at being deceived by his wife and younger son, he was also sorrowful that Esau wouldn’t receive what was rightfully his.

What are the lessons I’m supposed to learn from Rebekah? Is it okay to hoodwink your husband to get what you want for your beloved son? Speaking of sons, is it okay to play favorites? No, I don’t think so. At the same time, God told Rebekah that two nations were fighting within her womb and that the older would serve the younger. Perhaps she was remembering this promise when she planned the hoax. Perhaps she thought it was the best thing to do and that in carrying out her plan, she was simply doing her part to fulfill the prophecy.

So why is Rebekah so admired? Why are her virtues so extolled? Is it because she’s Isaac’s wife and matriarch of a dynasty? While it’s true that her story demonstrates the importance of a woman’s role in a family, there’s more to it than that. The decisions a woman makes can affect generations of her descendents.

Here’s what I think. I think Rebekah’s story remains in the Bible because, just like the rest of us, she was flawed. Families are complicated, and the relationships within them are dynamic and ever changing. Her love for Jacob and Isaac’s love for Esau could be demonstrated in homes all over the world. She and Jacob deliberately cooked up a sneaky scheme, and mothers everywhere are known to stretch the truth, withhold information, or champion the cause of one child or another. I’m not saying this is right; I’m saying it happens.

A Little Maid

I’m not good with children. Really, I’m not. I can love them and play with them and read to them, but teaching them is another story. That’s why I was a bit hesitant to substitute for one of the Primary teachers last Sunday. However, after reminding myself of the wonderful leaders and teachers who taught my three children when they were young, I agree to do it. After all, what kind of world would this be if no one volunteered to give time, energy, and guidance to the generations of the future?

That said, I’m sure glad that I said yes. Not only did I gain some insights into a fairly well-known Bible story, but I also got better acquainted with a wonderful group of children from ages 10-12. The story came from the II Kings, Chapter 5, and although I had a couple of activities and relevant stories to augment the lesson, I didn’t really need them because the children were so engaged…and engaging.

In brief, the story was about a great military leader, Namaan, who despite his victories and prestige, had a serious problem: leprosy. His wife had a “little maid” who had been captured by one of Namaan’s companies and brought back to Syria. One day she mentioned to Namaan’s wife that it would be so good if only he could meet Elisha, “the prophet in Samaria” because she was confident that Elisha could cure the leprosy. The wife apparently trusted this young maid because before you knew it, Namaan was asking the king to let him go to see Elisha. The king readily agreed, telling Namaan to go and sending him off with a letter to the king of Israel.

Elisha’s instructions to Namaan were simple, so simple in fact that Namaan was “wroth,” especially since they were delivered by a messenger and not Elisha himself. His servants prevailed upon him to do as Elisha told him to do, however, and after dipping himself in the Jordan River seven times, his leprosy was gone. He was clean, cured of the dreaded disease. Grateful, Namaan attempted to reward Elisha, but the latter refused any compensation, instead telling Namaan to “go in peace.” Gehazi, Elisha’s servant was not so scrupulous, but that’s a story for another day.

While most people probably read this story and think of Elisha and Namaan as being the prinicipal players, I keep thinking of the little maid. Not only was this young person (the children and I speculated about her age but never reached a consensus) kind enough to speak up to her mistress and tell her about Namaan, but she did so despite being captured and brought to his residence from Israel. I don’t know enough about her or about the history of the era to know whether this was “standard operating procedure,” but I do know that she was young and living away from her people. Still, she spoke up about the prophet of God, thereby saving a man’s life.

The lesson manual asked these questions that I’d never considered before Sunday: What does this tell us about this faithful Israelite girl? How can our faith help others? The children had plenty to say about the little maid and gave several examples of how they could say and do lots of different things to point people in the direction of God and His servants. What particularly touched me was how they realized that they, like the Israelite girl, could influence their parents, siblings, and maybe even teachers and other adults.

What about you? If a child can influence others by her actions (or his) what can we do?

Eating the Fruit

I just discovered something interesting about Eve. You know how people are always saying that she tempted Adam into tasting the delicious fruit and that it’s all her fault that we’re in the shape we’re in? If she’d just done what God told her to do, then they might be still in the garden, and we might not even be here! That’s a story for another day, however. The tale I want to tell today has to do with just who told Eve about not partaking of the fruit from the tree of life. I’d always assumed it was God and that He gave these instructions to the first couple as they stood there together, listening and learning. Not so.


I recently discovered that God told Adam and Adam told Eve. It’s not that big of a deal, or is it? As people living at this time in the world’s history, we know a little more about Adam, and we perceive him as an honest person. However, Eve knew nothing about him other than that he was the only other person roaming through Eden who looked sort of like her. He wasn’t a pelican or fox or orangutan, but a human being. So how did she know she could trust him? And how did she know the serpent represented evil? Eve lacked the experience and knowledge that we now have.

Today we know right from wrong through reading the scriptures, from listening to spiritual leaders, and from hearing the whisperings of the still small voice. She might have had certain advantages that we don’t (she got to live in Eden for a while), but we have access to knowledge accumulated through centuries and from all nations. We can learn vicariously from the mistakes and foibles of others, but Eve had no one to observe other than Adam.

While living on Earth today has its complications and hardships, it also has some advantages. One of those advantages is having access to so much knowledge, information, and spiritual guidance. We don’t have to take our husband’s word for something…or our wife’s, mother’s, father’s, or teacher’s. We can go straight to the scriptures and then pray about our concerns and questions. We can receive personal revelation for ourselves.  I wonder if Eve even considered that.

I’m not making excuses for Mother Eve. I’m just saying that I was wrong about God actually telling her about the fruit and that today we have access to much more information than she did. Does that mean we make fewer mistakes? Does it mean that we stay away from temptation?

Vashti Said No

Today I saw a young man with his jeans so low that I caught more than a glimpse of his blue anded plaid boxer shorts. I wonder if this is a new trend, having your under garments coordinate with your outer ones. Seems like I read a couple of years ago that women’s bra straps should blend or at least complement tank top colors. Gee whiz. Why not just make sure the under garments stay underneath???

All these sights have reminded me of Queen Vashti in the book of Esther. Everyone applauds Esther (and rightly so) for her courage in going before King Ahasuerus, but rarely do people have much to say about Vashti, the lady who sat on the throne before Esther came on the scene. Vashti, like Esther, risked everything she had in her communication with the king, and she paid a big price for it.

In a nutshell, there had been much merrymaking in the land for quite a while, 100 and fourscore days. After this time, Ahasuerus held yet another weeklong feast, one for the men and one for the women. From what I can glean from the scriptures, there was drinking and revelry among the men. On the 7th day, the king sent for his queen, Vashti, so that she could “shew the people and the princes her beauty.” She refused, and the king was “very wroth.”

I wasn’t there, and my only information is from the scriptures themselves and from some commentaries that I’ve read. My understanding of the events, however, is that perhaps Ahasuerus intended for Vashti to parade around in front of the drunken crowd. Rather than expose herself to leering gawkers, she said no. It would have been easier for her to go along, to be a good sport, but Vashti was courageous enough to say no. She must have known that there would be a consequence, but it didn’t matter. The scriptures tell us that anger burned in Ahasuerus, and at the prompting of his advisors, he gave her “royal estate to another.”

It might be a stretch, but I can see the application of the principles of modesty and courage in the world today. Why do people, men and women alike, bare shoulders, breasts, and midriffs for any and everyone to view? Why do young men feel the need to have their undies showing? Is it because of the need to be fashionable and to fit in? Doesn’t it take more courage to cover up and say NO to the wearing of revealing apparel than to give in to the popular trends of today?

What price will you pay to keep your throne? Will you say no to immodesty and immorality even if it costs you your popularity? Or will you go along with the world’s “look” to be accepted and popular?